MH FEATURED POLL #43: Do You Have Any Conscious Racial or Ethnic Preferences in Dating?

[CAT5 9075]

Do You Have Any Conscious Racial or Ethnic Preferences in Dating?






 
To submit a poll for the MH POLL OF THE WEEK, P.M. either @CAT5 or @beni with your poll question, choices, and state whether it's multiple choice or not.

[lichtlune 915]

I've been attracted to Mixed race, European, Asian, Spanish, etc. I don't know if I really have a preference because It kind of changes at times... I think I'm more interested in a girls fashion style over her race. Although I usually prefer lighter skin tones though. 

[Bear 1817]

No, I'm open to dating anyone, regardless of Race/Ethnicity.

[BrenGun 2261]

 

I just want a kawaii Japanese waifu/husbando to make my heart go doki doki o((◕ฺ∀ ◕✿ฺ))o

 

But, I'm open for whatever race.

someone just should let my heart go dokidokidoki...

 

But I feel most dokidoki to native american and Japanese guys with a slight of native american look.

 

However as so long a guy can make my heart go faster well then I also want him...

problem only is.. if I feel dokidoki... I always have bad luck, whatever race it is...

[YuyoDrift 1540]

I'm bored, so I'll partake in the discussion.

 

I was kinda hoping there was an option for "I'd prefer to stay away from my own Race/Ethnicity" lol its whatevs.

 

Dated Women of all kinds, and in all honesty, it has to do with the way they distinguish themselves that draws my interest and not so much where they're from.

 

I've recently enjoyed foreign girls the most, as supposed to women here in the states. The level of respect is Night/Day.

[pinkmakona 1810]

The "No, I'm open to dating anyone, regardless of Race/Ethnicity." 

 

Their background doesn't sway things for me. It mainly boils down to how much i like them and if i'm attracted to them and so on. 

[CAT5 9075]

I was kinda hoping there was an option for "I'd prefer to stay away from my own Race/Ethnicity" lol its whatevs.

 

Whoops, added! I knew the options felt like they were missing something, thanks!

[YuyoDrift 1540]

ugh can I vote again then? lol

[Ito 2438]

While I am certainly open to dating anyone, I would be lying if I said that I didn't have preferences. It more comes down to that I find some races more attractive that others, but that is entirely a personal preference, and honestly looks will only get you so far in a relationship.

 

 

Now to be gross lol, but I honestly can't see me ever dating anyone else that the person I am currently with XD

[violetchain 912]

I've never dated because I'm an awkward nerd, but I remember pointing out some guys I had crushes on in school to a new friend and she was like "So, what type of guy do you like? First you showed me an Indian guy, then a white guy, then an Asian one...", so I guess somewhere between options #3 and 5.

[Ro plz 1290]

Totally open to dating any one of any race. I used 2 be that weeb that wanted to only date asian women then i grew up and realized that every race/ethnicity has something to offer. And they also have people that id prefer to stay away from.

[Pretsy 1343]

Whereas the first thing that really matters to me in the end would be the attitude/personality/mentality, I have a very intriguing preference in terms of races anyway:

 

I have taught myself to loathe my own kind to the very extent. Yup - as much as I am "nordic white" (I am not an expert in race divisions but you get my point, rite?), I just cannot get behind being in more-than-just-friends-kind of relationship with my nordic chaps, since I am expecting them to bear apathetic, repressed approaches without any signs of empathy in the end (that's just my bias but I am unable to get over it).

 

Am I racist towards my own "kin"? Idk really, is it due to those "we need to fix these genetic iniquities"- sermons that were shoehorned inside my head by my fam and frequenting geneticists (I covered exact details related to this statement in another thread)? Am I merely focusing on cons of people that surround me? You might be wondering about the actual amount of my rhetoric questions, but the lifelong bias and amassed skepticism/elitism has derailed me completely from being an ordinary, sane chap like you guys above. As much as I managed to channel my self-loathing "away" from my thoughts, this has evolved into external loathing instead.

 

Tl;dr - I admit myself in being biasedly leaning towards peeps of the "opposite races" when it comes to potential dating purposes (not in my mind for now but it will be sooner...). One might go around and make fun of me as another "oooh you just want to have a Japanese waifu ooh you neckbeard fagit"-kind of geek but believe me honestly - my preferences are mostly warped by my own personal experiences, not by my own "entertaining" interests. I might as well count particular disasters when it comes to dating those of my own race ("nordic white" too) - and guess what: those were fucked up on behalf of my own VISIBLE discomfort towards minuses of partners I am noticing first before eventually trying to assess what's "good" about them.

 

PSA: for now, just consider me as a friend and you will be fine. I just need to get my shit together - maybe that would help me to accept anything without "scorn-red tinted glasses", lol. My apologies in case I offended anyone with this statement.

 

(Even now my fam has resorted to pleas in the vein of "we are fine with anything as long as she won't have any kind of trampy attitude!")

[CAT5 9075]

ugh can I vote again then? lol

You should see a 'delete my vote' option below the poll. That should do it!

As for me, my preferences have shifted over the years, but as of now, I'd say I'm definitely open to dating anyone. And while I'm sure I harbor a ton of subconscious biases, I feel like the only way to overcome those is to confront them head-on and embrace those 'uncomfortable' topics, etc. So in my experience, dating outside of my Race/Ethnicity has always been valuable and even enlightening in some ways. The woman I'm dating now lies outside of my race, ethnicity, and even nationality, but dating her has revealed to me a plethora of things about myself that I was previously oblivious to. Granted, dating within my race/ethnicity has been valuable too.

Somewhat related, but some members of my family have some rather strong views about dating outside of the race. I can understand them, though...even if my personal views differ. The world has come a long way, but living in the southeast region of the U.S., it's still pretty easy to see that racism is nowhere near dead, and that white supremacy is alive and well. Statistically speaking, black women are among the least desired women on the planet, and with the effects of white supremacy still very much in play, I can understand how someone would scoff at or even feel it disrespectful for an oppressed person to date someone who is not inherently oppressed. It almost seems counterproductive. I understand that, I get it, but I also understand the longings of the heart.

Thankfully, despite some of my family's views, they're still quite open and accepting of other races/ethnicities. In spite of their ideal wishes, I know they're open to anyone with a good heart.

[peffy 3568]

I'M NOT RACIST BUT

 

I am Asian (as in, "Oriental") and I prefer people who are Asian too. Ideally, someone who speaks a good amount of English and Cantonese and Japanese.

I just find it easier to relate, on a cultural level. 

 

I have had a crush on one white guy before... all others have been Asian.

 

 

Side note: my mother has said that if I ever dated someone with dark skin she'll have a heart attack/chain me up/murder the poor dude. =/

[saishuu 3220]

I'm open to dating anyone really, but I'm fully aware that I'm involuntarily predisposed to feel attracted to white people more often due to the standards of beauty that I'm exposed to more.

[blackdoll 907]

Yesssss but no because i have system Hot Asian > U.K > Hispanic > Arab > EU "White" > American "White" > "Black" but then i see a hot person from down line come in and try to stir up my loins. So it's no too. If everyone were naked and fit/caked up and not any variables like hair, fashion, speech, makeup, voice, talents, bone structure, hygiene, and attitude to also take into account then probably totally yes.  

[beni 2149]

I like whoever I like, no preference, no need as long as they're a sweet heart. They'll become even more attractive to me due to their kind nature. End up having eyes only on them.

[Zeus 7997]

Not gonna lie, I have preferences. But these preferences are about 10 to 15 percent of why I would choose to date or not date someone. And even though someone is outside of my preferences doesn't mean I won't find them attractive (I kinda have to considering my surrounds). Plenty of women have a type of beauty that only comes out over time. The more I get to know a woman and the more we begin to vibe, the more beautiful she will look to me. If we don't get along she will begin to look less attractive to me. I have little to no control over it other than knowing its there so I roll with it.

[YuyoDrift 1540]

I'M NOT RACIST BUT

 

I am Asian (as in, "Oriental") and I prefer people who are Asian too. Ideally, someone who speaks a good amount of English and Cantonese and Japanese.

I just find it easier to relate, on a cultural level. 

 

I have had a crush on one white guy before... all others have been Asian.

 

 

Side note: my mother has said that if I ever dated someone with dark skin she'll have a heart attack/chain me up/murder the poor dude. =/

 

How about light caramel skin?  Your mom can hurt me a little lol.

 

Hehe, but in all seriousness, I can relate to that problem you have with your mother.

 

I once dated a pretty girl, who's parents were from Cambodia. The day I met them and introduced myself, they didn't even take a glance at me and with an angry grin, told me to get out of their home. Well yeah, I felt like shit/pretty pissed off because I had never been so disrespected in my life. 

 

That's when her brother (who i'm very good friends with to this day) later tells me that his parents thought she was bringing home a fellow Khmer. Of course, she was beat (as is the custom with some foreign families/fathers) and she broke up with me as a result. 

 

To this day, I learned from that (had it a happen to me again with an Irish girl's father) mishap, and have learned to first go all out to get the father on his good side immediately lol. Doesn't matter if you have to arm wrestle the son of a bitch or take shot after shot of Jameson Whiskey until you black out, you have to make yourself known to the father when it comes to foreign girls in my experience. He's a man, a real man (get that idea in your head to help motivate you). You should dignify yourself as one as well.

[doombox 4421]

I definitely have preferences. But they only affect what kind of person I'm most comfortable approaching, not necessarily who I would take issue with approaching me. I was raised in a large Hispanic family, and so I feel most comfortable approaching Hispanic and Latino men and women. But, I tend to think there are attractive people in every ethnicity and I've pretty much dated the rainbow; White, Black, Hispanic, Asian. I'm open to anyone who has the right kind of personality and similar interests as me.

[plastic_rainbow 2162]

with little to no dating experience i have, okay i admit i have none, i honestly don't know about this one. though i think i'd prefer to stay away from my ethnic group. i'm from an asian minority group and i'm not too fond of its marriage culture. plus, i can't very well speak the language anymore so it'd feel awkward meeting the parents and elders. i'm still attracted to other asians though, but i wouldn't really say asians who were born and lived in asia for most of their life because i feel there's still a gap of cultural differences despite being the same race. and by this, i mean the difference between western and eastern views. it would be a messy relationship with these conflicting views and a lack of mutual understanding. other than asians, i feel rather attracted to whites too, but in the end it's the personality that really matters.

[emmny 4139]

preferences= (for the most part) thinly-veiled racism

 

rant:

white gays love to spit this "im only into white guys.....JUST A preference!!" shit and even the word preference makes my skin crawl. i mean its not realistic to be attracted to everything but don't spit out ur racism/fat-shaming/internalized homophobia/transphobia for a certain race/body type while excluding all others in the name of preferences. it sounds a lot like the tumblr bullshit or complaining for the sake of complaining but when u see how much people are excluded by certain ideals of beauty/attractiveness in a community which is made of misfits rejected by society only to establish their own hierarchy and continue on rejecting others for their looks is upsetting. im not sure how relevant this is in the straight world, they have their own issues to deal with, but i don't like the local gay culture and i stay away from it. i don't mean to start a fight over this and call people racist or whatever, race is complicated; just consider where your "preferences" come from.

/rant over

[LIDL 692]

Hmmm, I am not sure, I just move with the flow.

So far all the ones I've been with are Caucasian.

If given the chance I bleive I will just take a shot and see how far we can go.

Relationship to me is not about the colour of your skin but how well him and me can working together as a team.

[peffy 3568]

How about light caramel skin?  Your mom can hurt me a little lol.

 

Hehe, but in all seriousness, I can relate to that problem you have with your mother.

 

I once dated a pretty girl, who's parents were from Cambodia. The day I met them and introduced myself, they didn't even take a glance at me and with an angry grin, told me to get out of their home. Well yeah, I felt like shit/pretty pissed off because I had never been so disrespected in my life. 

 

 

That's a harsh reaction from her parents, yikes. Sorry you had to go through that =(

 

My mother would not like a dude with light caramel skin, but she'd tolerate it. The darker the skin, the less she likes it. She's afraid of having grandchildren with dark skin. She's super racist T_T;; but I'm not surprised, she grew up poor in semi-rural China and kind of lacked education.

 

~

 

I was thinking, right now I'm in this "all Asian" phase. Most of my favourite stuff is Asian (of the East Asian variety). 99.99% of the music I listen to is Japanese or Chinese. Asian foods, Asian furniture styles, Asian instruments, Asian movies, Asian weapons/martial arts, Asian history, even Asian religions lol. If I had to pick a place to go on vacation, I'd pick an Asian country. All of that probably makes me prefer Asians, because the most likely people who'd share my interests are, logically, Asians.

 

..At earlier points in my life, I had an "all Black" phase and an "all White" phase, but that didn't really extend to romance.

[desparejo86 160]

My default attraction is to latina or african-american women. Naturally someone's race isn't the only factor or even the close to the main factor when seeking the right match for me, but if we're talking about attractions and, all things being equal, preferences, I would definitely prefer to date a woman who is of the aforementioned ethnicities. Theyre just sexier.