Cracked officially roasts Visual Kei

[Pretsy 1343]

Cracked, Buzzfeed, Gawker and The Cuck (oh yes, Gawker's new webmag for men...are you really serious, numales?) are pretty much all that same gray, irrelevant millenial mass to me. So what was the fuss again? One anonymous person exaggerating stories and getting most prolly some nice bucks for (sub)consciously shitting on sanely thinking VK fans? "One pax source = tr00 af by ALL means" has truly become the new dimension of so-called "journo investigation" - or let's name it correctly, "yellow sensationalist journalism". I mean holy heck - I would never think that we give these numales and other easily offended but hypocrite millenials a huge-ass limelight/spotlight for further shitposting.

 

As it was said above - as much as certain tsunagari/mitsu episodes may sound pretty funny, no scene in any genre is filled with roses, flowers and bees - there's a lot of dirt in all of them and exploiting dirt in this kind of "Goddamnit Japan" fashion  just double-standardizes the millenial concept of prejudice/racism/xenophobia (i.e. "I am allowed to trash  any (sub)culture I deem to be odd to me whereas others should not question me!!1!") even further.

 

I wish I would get the humor here but jesus christ, this guy seems to be too much of that typical Gawker journo type I really loathe (thank god for Hulkster showing that these journo offsprings don't mean a heck in this world).

 

edit: so it wasn't a guy but well...all the same nonetheless, feminist/numale sympathies.

 

Edited August 12, 2016 by Alroy

[Tokage 5930]

''This VK Musician Was Forced To Sell His Body To Fangirls For Lunch Money. What Happens Next Will Warm Your Heart.''

 

[enyx 903]

Quote

"Every month you send your favorite band member an amount of money. If you go low-end, it could be anywhere from [$200-400] a month. In these kinds of relationships, you get to maybe talk with the guy on the phone. The more expensive ones can go as high as [$1,000] a month. What you usually get with these are dates and sex. He will meet you, take you to Disneyland, bring you home, fuck you, and whisper how he loves you.

Pshhhhhh. I've been sending YOSHIKI all of my student loan money each month for the last 3 years and all he did for me was promise me a catering role in that new Lady's X project.

[doombox 4421]

7 hours ago, Traxan said:

 

There's nothing western pop culture media loves more than to portray the Japanese as insane. Then again, Japan does make it extremely easy for them.

 

This list is worse, IMO. It mostly focuses on Korea.

 

http://listverse.com/2015/05/19/10-horrifying-realities-from-the-world-of-asian-pop-music/

True. I guess I'm just surprised they went for vk when, like the article you posted, I assumed the pop market would be the easier grab. 

[LIDL 692]

I don't know her

Is this like Pitchfork with humor sense?

[Peace Heavy mk II 7200]

5 hours ago, Tokage said:

''This VK Musician Was Forced To Sell His Body To Fangirls For Lunch Money. What Happens Next Will Warm Your Heart.''

 

"YOSHIKI WAS LEFT IN A ROOM FULL OF ANGRY BEES. WHAT HAPPENS NEXT MADE MY JAW DROP TO THE FLOOR"

[Tokage 5930]

''This Video Proves You've Been Buying Maxi-Singles Wrong Your Whole Life''

 

''A Man Postponed His Band's Album Release To Sell Potato Chips. The Reason Why Will Break Your Heart.''

 

''11 STDs Everyone Who Fucked Lycaon Members In 2010 Will Remember''

 

[Ada Suilen 652]

O.O

It is fucking funny how people can appear so ignorant and dumb!! What an absurd article!!

[vanivani 558]

Yeah, if this true, she must follow a band with some really shitty fans.

A lot of this seems a bit exaggerated. 

Edited August 12, 2016 by vanivani

[doombox 4421]

It's not so much exaggerated as it is rarer cases of the worst side of the scene. This is not every fans experience but I've heard of it all happening over and over again through the years. The website themselves takes things and spins them in a comical or absurd light, so that is important to remember. They picked the horror stories on purpose.

[YuyoDrift 1540]

14 hours ago, peffy said:

Quote

Some literally don't even know how to play their instruments because they don't have to.

 

Is this actually true?

 

 

Have you heard of mejibray?

Edited August 12, 2016 by YuyoDrift

[Traxan 148]

I'm surprised to hear this, re: no talent. Every Japanese metal band I've heard has embodied musical excellence.

[peffy 3568]

1 hour ago, YuyoDrift said:

 

Have you heard of mejibray?

 

lol

<-- Mejibray's drummer is literally my avatar.

 

I know you're joking but

I'm reasonably convinced that Mejibray can play instruments, even if you don't like the sounds that they produce

 

this is the first thing that popped up on youtube

I mean, I guess you could get all conspiracy theorist and say "what if he's just air guitaring"..

Anyway my problems with Mejibray have more to do with the vocals and the usually-bland songwriting.

 

Speaking of songwriting, I have heard accusations that most VK bands don't actually write their own music/lyrics. That's a more believable accusation than "they don't know how to play their instruments".

Edited August 12, 2016 by peffy

[YuyoDrift 1540]

16 minutes ago, peffy said:

 

lol

I know you're joking but

 

 

 

[Peace Heavy mk II 7200]

The rumors about bands with ghost writers / musicians have been circulating for literally years. Every so often someone comes out with info that shows the vkei scene isn't always nyappy, such as Devil Kitty's Yuuga exposing how some bands don't even sign their own checkis / merch, and numerous people getting caught in sexual scandals, like that guy from Dear L'Novel  and Totto from L,Dear.

 

Lest we forget Crane-gate. 

Edited August 12, 2016 by Peace Heavy mk II

[Tokage 5930]

never forget that drummer from Himitsu Kessha Codomo A embezzling money and leaking band members' personal info either...

[emmny 4139]

13 hours ago, Peace Heavy mk II said:

Devil Kitty's Yuuga exposing how some bands don't even sign their own checkis / merch

BEB WE DEMAND THE RECEIPTS...how did i miss this $hade

[Takadanobabaalien 3607]

The overseas fanbase is very different, but if you've lived in Japan and attended a bunch of lives/start going regularly then you'll know that this article is actually kinda accurate on. With a humour twist to it, obviously, 

[Anne Claire 392]

VISUAL KEI: EXPOSED!!!!111

[nekkichi 6043]

On 8/12/2016 at 6:20 PM, Tokage said:

''11 STDs Everyone Who Fucked Lycaon Members In 2010 Will Remember''

 

this is terrifyingly close to truth t b h

 

 

 

 

[NICKT 147]

I'm curious, is it just the underground nature of Visual Kei that gives way to instances like this? Or is it more of a Japanese thing?

[doombox 4421]

5 minutes ago, NICKT said:

I'm curious, is it just the underground nature of Visual Kei that gives way to instances like this? Or is it more of a Japanese thing?

Maybe a little of both? Young women tend to be competitive with each other (maybe more-so in Japan?), people take advantage of that and whip them into a frenzy to spend a lot of money and that competitive nature can get ugly really fast.  

[Chi 2624]

On 12/08/2016 at 11:20 AM, Tokage said:

''This Video Proves You've Been Buying Maxi-Singles Wrong Your Whole Life''

 

''A Man Postponed His Band's Album Release To Sell Potato Chips. The Reason Why Will Break Your Heart.''

 

''11 STDs Everyone Who Fucked Lycaon Members In 2010 Will Remember''

 

 

this is my new favorite tokage post

[blackdoll 907]

are there any sextapes?

[Jigsaw9 6783]

^ There's a TenTen sextape of some chick giving him a blowjob iirc.