ghost

Fall fal fall. Out with the ugh, in with the calm.

haven't drawn since february

hello emo girl here
 
 

"It's not summer if your tongue isn't blue"

About due time to cut my hair. Gets wavy and does whatever the hell it wants.
 

[mode of Grab The Fan's Wealth]

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

Love them or hate them, almost everyone's got an opinion about Dir en grey. The scene stops to listen whenever Dir en grey announce a new single or album. As a long time fan of the band, I think it's the perfect time to express how I feel about all of their albums. My feelings will differ from album to album. Some albums have had the benefit of twenty years and others only a few months, so that's always going to be a factor in how I rank things. I will cover this from my least favorite album to my most favorite album, but by no means take this as a definitive list for Dir en grey. Everyone will have their own rankings and their own suggestions for where to start. I happen to think that this also a great order to introduce someone to this band.
 
This is a perfect topic for those that don't listen to Dir en grey or don't know where to start, current fans looking for spicy opinions and a pot to stir, or even old fans looking for a reintroduction into their new era. Not only have I included a PV for each album as a sampler, but I also put together suggested playlists for each album. The playlists are the order that I would have arranged the band if I were them. The songs are the songs that I believe are the best from each period. Some will require more effort than others to construct. To make it simpler, I have included my favorite three tracks and one music video from each album.

I will not consider the mini albums MISSA and six Ugly in this analysis, but some of those tracks will appear in the playlists I create.
 
DUM SPIRO SPERO
 
Album No: 8
Released: August 2, 2011
Length: 67:31
 
 
鬼葬 (kisou)
 
Album No: 3
Released: January 30, 2002
Length: 69:57
 
THE MARROW OF A BONE

Album No: 6
Released: February 7, 2007
Length: 50:05
 
ARCHE
 
 
Album No: 9
Released: December 10, 2014
Length: 68:01
 
🎖️The Insulated World🎖️
 
Album No: 10
Released: September 26, 2018
Length: 50:27

🏅Withering to death.🏅
 
Album No: 5
Released: March 9, 2005
Length: 51:14

🥉MACABRE🥉
 
Album No: 2
Released: September 20, 2000
Length: 72:57

🥈GAUZE🥈
 
Album No: 1
Released: July 28, 1999
Length: 64:47
 
🥇UROBOROS🥇
 
Album No: 7
Released: November 11, 2008
Length: 58:54

👑VULGAR👑
 
Album No: 4
Released: September 10, 2003
Length: 57:02

That's everything folks! Thanks for reading all the way to the end! Did you like it? Did you agree? Do you have your own rankings? Leave them below! I'm interested to know what everyone's opinions are, especially since Dir en grey is one of my favorite bands ever. So many people are passionate about this band like no other. If enough people liked this, I may follow up soon with one for the GazettE.
 

Until next time

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

Store employee shot the shoot! lolol
 
Thanks man! Just got them last week 😎

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

DID YOU SHOOT YOUR SHOT THO
 
😛
 
ahaha, I dig your shoes btw, bruh. Nice! 👌👌👌
 

I wonder if she's wearing that Impaled Nazarene shirt because she's a fan or because it's cool? Kinda weird seeing such a popular artist wear merch by a band that has both homophobic and nationalistic lyrics.

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

Met Charli XCX. She's nice.
 

Wow, Tommy Wiseau sure has some pipes!

two recent dreams:
 
1) Lizzo was visiting some rural Polish village, and for some unfathomable reason my parents were supposed to show her around. And I remember my helpless frustration trying to explain to them what is she about and desperately hoping they would not offend her somehow~ 
 
2) I was once again in some small town, on some business. Some random dude and I got called over by a pair of siblings, a woman and a man, to investigate strange occurrences in the nearby village. The random dude was apparently my partner or sth. Anyway, we get there and it turns out that people are getting turned into rabid animals and eating other people. We find a half-dead boar, which we believed was once a man, bring him to a nearby dilapidated house and figure we need to open up his stomach to somehow prove that he was indeed a former human. The siblings believe that it was once their cousin but they reluctantly agree and I cut the animal open. Fuck but it was gross. There were human remains, and also some kind of parasite growing inside, presumably causing the change. My partner left to wash his hands in the bathroom and I turn to the siblings only to see that they're both bleeding from their eyes and noses. Somehow I knew that it was a symptom of the change, I go to tell my partner only to find him in the same state. And then I woke up. 
  

Had another half asleep, half awake dream last night.
 
I was lying on my bed with my face turned towards my bedroom door. I sleep with the door open in the summer time because it gets really stuffy in my room. I thought I sensed something moving around outside so I opened my eyes. I saw this tall, thin, silhouette walking past the door, left to right, right to left. It resembled the creature in Insidious when it's standing in the shadow. I was scared, but I couldn't move. It's then I realized I was half asleep, half awake and my body was in sleep paralysis. Anytime I looked away and looked back at the doorway, it got closer still pacing left to right, right to left. I was sweating profusely, trying desperately to get up, but my body refused to move from its rigid catatonic state. I couldn't take seeing what it was so I just closed my eyes hoping it would either go away or do what it came to do quickly. But I soon fell back asleep and everything was fine.
 
 

holy fuck this smashes my balls 

I've come to the depressing realization that I'm approaching my thirties and that's hindering further my ability to form close friendships, since everyone around me is more and more invested in their significant others/offspring and is making it really difficult to form close friendship bonds when their priorities clearly lie somewhere else. The whole inherently sexual dynamic around interactions makes it really difficult to form the kind of bonds I need, be it because I can't provide it or because people are getting it elsewhere and thus forming closer bonds elsewhere.
I think I might have depression and it's embarrassing to even get to the point where, despite being and extremely independent person, loneliness has me sinking further and further (and thus further devoting time and resources to mild coping mechanisms such as VK).
I'm pissed movies and books lied to me about close friendships and I feel I face deep suffering one way or another, either by depriving myself of the emotional connection I need, either suffering from "giving in" to someone else's needs in order to have said emotional connection.
 
I don't think I can live my whole life like this.

"If she's one in a million, there are 37 of her in California."

I don't remember where I heard this quote but it changed my perspective on life. Dating too, but life.

I've been in a relationship for almost seven years, so I've been out the dating game for some time. Even if I was single, I'd have no tangible advice to give. I wasn't exactly attracting throngs of women to me for being myself, and that may have been a blessing in disguise for me. As I grow older, I realize just how toxic and damaged so many people are, and inviting that kind of energy into your life only brings negativity. The only thing worse than feeling single and alone is feeling lonely in a shit relationship.
 

@Kabukichoatmidnight
 
I'm doing much better now. I think I was just going through a moment. Also, I think age has to do with part of it. I'm on the older side and not finding someone has made me anxious about it. But I'm realizing more and more it's not uncommon for people my age (or even older) to not have found someone yet. And I'm coming to terms with that.
 
And the person I had an interest in, I've since lost my interest in them romantically. For me I think amongst friends that kind of relationship should come naturally. In this case it felt very one sided so I got the sense she wasn't into me at all that way. I'm also all about getting to the point and hate love games. But I also have to feel a connection with the other friend.
 
When it comes to strangers though, I have no issues letting them know I'm interested. Hell, I asked someone on my morning bus route to work a couple months ago 😂

A whole lotl axolotl. This is a continuation of my planet series. The sprouty pink planet represents my love for Japanese sweet potatoes. And also in my love an axolotl there is too 🍠