random thoughts thread

[secret_no_03 959]

I'm not a fan of Starbucks, but I love their pumpkin spice coffee creamer.

[Komorebi 2193]

Japanese immigration laws literally told me to go fuck myself. I'm reconsidering husband hunting.

[suji 8317]

motherfucking SONG OF THE YEAR

 

[sleepy coffee 1476]

On 10/15/2019 at 3:08 AM, heresytrash said:

Working graveyard is gonna be the death of me one day lol 

Oh god I remember the days of having to pull graveyard shifts at security 

[CAT5 9075]

Holy shit, I might actually have to watch this now. This was one of those events that the U.S. likes to pretend didn't happen.

 

https://decider.com/2019/10/20/watchmen-premiere-tulsa-1921-massacre-race-riots/

[colorful人生 2777]

2 hours ago, CAT5 said:

Holy shit, I might actually have to watch this now. This was one of those events that the U.S. likes to pretend didn't happen.

 

https://decider.com/2019/10/20/watchmen-premiere-tulsa-1921-massacre-race-riots/

 

Not a huge TV person, but that's piqued my interest too. While I was vaguely familiar with the Tulsa Race Massacre, I only learned of the Wilmington insurrection of 1898 (which happened in my own state) this year from the Vox video below:

 

 

[chocobuzz 752]

Kinda painful to watch how my dad is slowly killing himself with alcohol. He's just drunk all the time and has been to the hospital for who knows how many times already because of too much drinking. He was told by a doctor already 20 years ago that his liver was in a very bad condition because of alcohol, and he did manage to reduce his drinking a good amount back then (mainly because mom was always so mad at him about it - I still remember those nights when he came back home late and drunk as fuck and mom yelled at him. I had never seen her so angry. It scared the shit out of me). But after I moved out and mom divorced him a little over 2 years ago, he of course started drinking more again. And it's gotten to the point where he's pretty much always just drunk again. I wonder how much time he has left if he keeps that up... Most likely not much. I'm not very close with him (I'm actually a bit scared of him) but I still don't want him to die like that...

Why does alcohol even have to exist? What good has it ever done to anyone? Just how many families has it ruined? How many kids has it traumatized? I don't think I even wanna know...

[suji 8317]

28 minutes ago, chocobuzz said:

Kinda painful to watch how my dad is slowly killing himself with alcohol. He's just drunk all the time and has been to the hospital for who knows how many times already because of too much drinking. He was told by a doctor already 20 years ago that his liver was in a very bad condition because of alcohol, and he did manage to reduce his drinking a good amount back then (mainly because mom was always so mad at him about it - I still remember those nights when he came back home late and drunk as fuck and mom yelled at him. I had never seen her so angry. It scared the shit out of me). But after I moved out and mom divorced him a little over 2 years ago, he of course started drinking more again. And it's gotten to the point where he's pretty much always just drunk again. I wonder how much time he has left if he keeps that up... Most likely not much. I'm not very close with him (I'm actually a bit scared of him) but I still don't want him to die like that...

Why does alcohol even have to exist? What good has it ever done to anyone? Just how many families has it ruined? How many kids has it traumatized? I don't think I even wanna know...

My uncle drank all his life even while we persuaded for him to get help and is now bedridden with a variety of problems. I'm sorry to hear about your dad; I hope he gets the help he needs.

[Zeus 7997]

14 hours ago, chocobuzz said:

Kinda painful to watch how my dad is slowly killing himself with alcohol. He's just drunk all the time and has been to the hospital for who knows how many times already because of too much drinking. He was told by a doctor already 20 years ago that his liver was in a very bad condition because of alcohol, and he did manage to reduce his drinking a good amount back then (mainly because mom was always so mad at him about it - I still remember those nights when he came back home late and drunk as fuck and mom yelled at him. I had never seen her so angry. It scared the shit out of me). But after I moved out and mom divorced him a little over 2 years ago, he of course started drinking more again. And it's gotten to the point where he's pretty much always just drunk again. I wonder how much time he has left if he keeps that up... Most likely not much. I'm not very close with him (I'm actually a bit scared of him) but I still don't want him to die like that...

Why does alcohol even have to exist? What good has it ever done to anyone? Just how many families has it ruined? How many kids has it traumatized? I don't think I even wanna know...

None of the pleading in the world could stop my grandfather from drinking himself to death. People drink for a variety of reasons and it would be foolish of me to assume his, but if he's facing death's door and he still won't stop then something must be compelling him to drink. Give yourself the peace of mind and say whatever you want to say to him now, because once he's gone he is gone for good. Maybe it will work.

[plastic_rainbow 2162]

the envy 10inch sold out..........i shouldn't have waited to order it 😥

[Hohchicano96 153]

Guess who’s the lucky bitch dealing with ear issues again? Yep, I’m back at it with otitis externa of the left ear! At least I got the ciprodex to deal with this shit.

[platy 3018]

I really miss the old summoner class  (ff14). There was no time to even think about being bored since there was so much it could do. Now it's just a lame DPS class (which is still one of my mains). I understand why scholar went under the same revamp I guess, but I still miss how busy it used to be.

[Jenova 35]

I think I wandered back into the visual kei community at an interesting time tbh also it's dead af at work wow

[violetchain 912]

 

[Karma’s Hat 3107]

I went back to RYM and suddenly music became interesting again. I don't know if it says something about me or the age we're in that I need to micromanage some internet application like last.fm, rym etc. for me to really put in some thought into my relationship with music. I would like to think that its kind of an aesthetic outlet for me tinker with charts when I'm too lazy to make any music myself and really fill that need to do something with my time. 

 

 

[Romlaw 82]

On 10/27/2019 at 4:50 PM, chocobuzz said:

Why does alcohol even have to exist? What good has it ever done to anyone? Just how many families has it ruined? How many kids has it traumatized? I don't think I even wanna know...

If it was not alcohol it would be another drug. When you get to that point of hurting yourself by drinking it is quite obvious you are running from something you don't want to face. Like all other drugs, it will only go away if you solve or at least try to solve whatever deep problem you have that makes being sober so horrible.

 

Most times people are just not aware of what the problem actually is though, making it almost impossible to do something about it.

[Gesu 1537]

I've been trying to save my money lately because a) it's Christmas next month and b) there are things I want to save up for next year but it looks like I need to buy some warmer clothes soon or else I'm probably going to get hypothermia (no joke, it's really fucking cold here). As crappy as I feel about not being frugal, like my grandma said, there's no point in saving up for anything if I'm too ill to do anything with it. I know she's right but it makes me feel crappy for some reason. 🥶

[Aferni 2381]

Edited November 7, 2019 by Aferni

[suji 8317]

oh fuck Mortiis is coming to Texas next year and i kinda wanna go for my birthday??????? someone take me pls

[Bear 1817]

1 hour ago, suji said:

oh fuck Mortiis is coming to Texas next year and i kinda wanna go for my birthday??????? someone take me pls

 

Is it dungeon synth Mortiis or industrial rock Mortiis?

 

If it's dungeon synth Mortiis it's highly recommended if you like gigs without much happening. He's for most part standing still, barely looking up from the laptop and his synth, but well worth it imo. I had a blast seeing him a couple of years ago. Was superb and I'd wish for. 9/10

 

But again, I love ambient and ritualistic gigs  where not much happens in general. It's not for everyone, but if into that stuff it's fantastic.

[colorful人生 2777]

sciatica pain is a bitch. welp, time to check in w/ my doctor tomorrow to see if I perma-fucked my back. 

[Jenova 35]

Aw man, I hate sciatica.  Hopefully you feel better soon! When I get an episode I can barely sit up and getting up is out of the question from how intense the pain is.

[CAT5 9075]

A few random thoughts that have been bouncing around my head this past week:

 

#1: People trying to cancel T.I. for essentially being a father. Firstly, it's really no one's business how this man chooses to govern his household. Secondly, there are over 60,000 missing African American girls and women in the U.S., sex-trafficking is at an all-time high, new strands of HIV and STDs are still being discovered, the rate of single-motherhood among African American homes is THROUGH THE ROOF, but T.I. is getting shit for being "overprotective"???? Fuck outta here. We NEED more overprotective parents.

 

#2: The way ppl have responded to this is yet another indicator that society has gone far, far off the rails. But I do think there is a silver-lining to this massive attack on men and masculinity. A lot of ppl have been hurt and traumatized by the abuse and misuse of masculinity. I get it. But swinging the pendulum in the opposite extreme through feminism  and attacking any and everything that is masculine is definitely not the answer. I just hope people wake up and realize that both genders are equal in worth, but different in function. We balance each other. We need each other. You'd think this would be obvious by the fact that all of us are alive because of *GASP* a man, and a woman, but we just complicate things endlessly with vain rhetoric that obscures that reality.

 

#3: I saw someone post this on fb recently and it made me chuckle a bit:

it's obviously satirical, but it wouldn't be so funny if it didn't reflect our reality in some way. I've come across a lot of people (on and offline) that are triggered by new or different viewpoints, and I think it's pretty troublesome...I think it's worse online because ppl will unfriend, unfollow, or block you. It's like everyone creates their own little, self-contained echo-chambers. I don't see how this is helpful to anyone. We live in a big world. With people of all kinds of backgrounds, experiences, and beliefs. So what good is it to live in a world like this and not be able to interface with people of different mindsets without getting emotional, defensive, or hostile? Why can't people simply hear each other out and try to understand each other's perspectives? I think the reason is that people simply do not like being uncomfortable. I can understand it. It's uncomfortable to have your beliefs questioned or challenged by others, and probably even moreso for one to question their own beliefs and ideas...and whatever they hold to be true.

 

It's wild to me tho, because ppl would rather get hostile or cut ppl off for having different views before they even try to understand the other person. Which also makes no sense to me, because what if that other person has some wisdom to offer you? What if they could provide some insight that might be resourceful to you? What if they could offer some knowledge that might help you see things in a more well-rounded, or truthful light? So many ppl cut themselves off from this potential out of the fear that they might actually be wrong. Because being wrong doesn't feel good. It doesn't feel...comfortable. But it's ok to be wrong. It's also ok to be corrected. How would you know not to put your hand in a fire if you didn't know what fire felt like?

 

People like that, who avoid the discomfort, stunt their own growth. And i've realized that people ultimately value comfort more than they do truth. And the irony there is this: how is anything outside of the truth truly comfortable? If it's not truth, it's a lie. So it's not actual comfort, It's just an illusion. Many people are comfortable living in delusion. And most of us happily delude ourselves daily. I'm not exempt from this either. I mean, i'm damn sure guilty of this too. But it took my delusions being shattered (which is painful as fuck) to realize that I didn't and still don't know a thing. It took one strong wind for me to realize the house I thought I was "comfortable" in was actually a house built of sand. I had to realize that I didn't know a thing. And how could I? This world is vast and infinite (GITS quote ), and i'm just little ol me. I'm just one speck of dust amongst billions, so who am I to walk around thinking i got everything figured out? It's entirely possible that some of those other specks just might know something that I don't They might just have another piece that I can add to this jigsaw puzzle called life. They might not. But i'm never gonna know if I only interact with the specks of dust that only think things that I agree with, or things that make me feel "comfortable".

 

Anyways, i can ramble on and on. I'll stop here.

[Komorebi 2193]

I tweeted something about teenagers being horny towards adults all the time made me really uncomfortable and VK twitter turned it into me being an anti-lgbt incel or something. 

 

Also, wtf is "ok boomer" supposed to mean?

 

I'm really sick about everyone demanding respect for minorities but the minute I say I'm asexual and excess of sex in conversations makes me uncomfortable I'm ostracized and/or bullied.

 

My mental health took a bad turn and I caught myself about to google what was the right way to cut yourself. I'm exhausted. Of society.

[platy 3018]

Twitter is literally a cesspool of never ending pointless arguments. Whenever I decide to have a look at my timeline (or whatever the twitter version is) it's just hard to believe how toxic of a place it is. 98% of arguments on there are pointless as no one is willing to listen, but rather toot their own perfect horn. It's all irrelevant in the end as the opinion of illogical strangers shouldn't be taken seriously. Cutting it out of my life was the best decision. You will not find acceptance there, if anything you'll hate yourself more for not fitting the standards and micro-rules people create for every single label of society. Those people are far removed from the world. You'll only find despair and hatred for human stupidity the more you get caught up in Internet politics.