少女椿
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Content Count
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Joined
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Days Won
1
Everything posted by 少女椿
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Happy new year, and good bye...
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reminiscing2004 reacted to this
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The best Christmas and the best year ever... it was scary to choose between NOTHING and IMPOSSIBLE, and it seems we have no way back... love and be loved, MH no minna!
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Rarely post selfies, but here's my poor attempts at being... at being, okay. Feel myself so old, dear jesus... https://wear.jp/sp/romanticist1120/
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Trying to stay cute while thinking about my perspectives being a good mom (to be honest I'm extremely sick, both mentally and physically) Well... who knows...
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I was busy with christmas gift for my prescious love, and bought little treasures for myself... I'm a rare guest here, if you're interested in my collection updates, I'm trying to stay active here.
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The fuck is going on, but right in the timing i want to kill myself I found out I'm pregnant. Jesus, what a year...
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It's so fun to see when people are mourning when celebrities talks about depression or committed suicide, but when it comes to the closest relationships, friends, parents, they always, like, "you? Depression? Pff, no", when I'm trying to describe my feelings and thinking about suicide, trying to get help, everyone pretending that nothing happens at all. I dont want to deal with it. When I was 15, I thought it would be good to die at 35. I'm turning 28 next week, and the last couple of weeks my mind was changed. Doesn't matter how hard I try, I'm tired. I have no interest in life. Tired to change myself for being good for everyone, to be worth to hear a single cheerful word. I'm not sure I want to wait until 35. If life brings nothing but pain, there's no reason to wait? Too deep thoughts for the lunch break, huh... I'm working with people who turned 95, 98, 100, 102. I'm here I am, almost 28, moving like a puppet doll, emotionless, trying to hide tears. Forgot how to live without "I want to die, I want to die, I want to die" in my head, every day, every fucking second.
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Why it's so hard to stop spending money on clothes...
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Doesn't matter how many battles I've won growing up from UWU KAWAII BANGYA MARRY ME to my current self, mentally strong and responsible, how many "friends" were lost just because I felt myself emotionally abused, but society and "fandom" are rejecting that fact that people are tending to grow up and change their selves and their lives. This isn't even fun anymore, but I can't stop thinking I was trying too hard to see I've got literally nothing, this kind of "zero" you may describe as "stability". I'm drained.
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Literally my life.
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Nostalgic.
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Your daily dose of your personal retro manga girl Trying to catch birthday mood, ah...
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He was the cutest Karma's fangirl... rip
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Neeeeeed
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I think I give up on uploadings, sad to see it's just drowning and doesn't get an attention it deserves...
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At first I was like "ew, furry...", but then I realized I was a part of sonic the hedgehog fandom when I was 12 or 13, and their furry roleplay was a common thing... 🤔
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Host and "nowadays" vkei culture is so cheap, jesusss. Finally able to describe that emotion after being chikaned by random vkei-ish guy on my way home, and his "friends" were just laughing. It makes me so sick, I dont want this kind of attention at all, especially from such a 下品 people...
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@nikuman I hate being touched by people I'm not emotionally attached to, so I just run away and started to cry when I got home. It wasn't the first time, the first place in my personal ranking is a really awful situation when I was kissed by a drunk host and he was trying to touch my bra while I was too shocked to run away...
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I thought I was into girls and extremely unlucky with relationships, and I was that kind of sad old virgin (asexual old virgin) everyone always mention when it comes to talking about poor singles. But then I lost my virginity with the man I love to the moon and back, I'm 27 and finally feel myself ready for this kind of relationships (like, I feel myself hungry and naughty all the time we meet!), so yes, virginity isn't a question of time, but question of your mental state... I feel a bit ashamed of being a virgin for too long, on the other hand I'm ashamed to lost my virginity before marriage, because I was raised like that...
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Vkei meets engrish, and this is absolutely adorable
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"hambr stick" oh Tomo, I think we know what "pencil" you were talking about .
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少女椿 and Bunny-Usagii reacted to this
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Feeling cute, looking dead
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