Total Saikou

Now, cursed images are a hobby of mine. I collect them as best I can, and my favourite kind are without a doubt, cursed VK images. I even made a compilation video of all the ones I collected:
There's just so many! So I figured, how about you? I was inspired to make a topic for cursed VK images after all the lovely posts we had back in the random thoughts thread. Do you have some cursed images in your stockpile to share? If so, I'd love to see them!
I'll start off with the one I posted in the random thoughts thread a few days ago, as it's so cursed that I'm sad that it missed the video

I also found some more of this cursed pairing just now!


^Now that's spicy

Please ban gackt
https://jrocknews.com/2020/05/gackt-penis-training.html 

I wonder how many people use this. And I wonder how many celebrities have their own credit card. 

Like a normal mastercard, I'm assuming... Oh wow, I found out that there's more than one, actually. 
There's the Rakuten Mastercard that offers you lots of points and stuff
There's the Underground Kingdom Visa card that gives you "member only items" (whatever that is... Free Yoshiki Bathwater, maybe?)
There's also a Mastercard from Underground Kingdom but with Yoshikitty on it
All 3 give you discounts for X Japan and Yoshiki  related stuff (like merch) from what I can gather. 

Like a normal mastercard, I'm assuming... Oh wow, I found out that there's more than one, actually. 
There's the Rakuten Mastercard that offers you lots of points and stuff
There's the Underground Kingdom Visa card that gives you "member only items" (whatever that is... Free Yoshiki Bathwater, maybe?)
There's also a Mastercard from Underground Kingdom but with Yoshikitty on it
All 3 give you discounts for X Japan and Yoshiki  related stuff (like merch) from what I can gather. 

Klaha is 50 years old today! Wherever he is...
 

Since Közi has been uploading quite a few acoustic MALICE MIZER cover snippets on Twitter in the past year or so, I thought it'd be fun to try to gather them here in one post. I've put the videos under individual spoiler cuts so that the page doesn't become too bogged-down/media-heavy.
 
claire～月の調べ～
 
Ju te veux
 
Garnet～禁断の園へ～
 
...okay I thought there was more, but actually the other vids are him doing ZIZ or solo tracks, heh. Still pretty cool.  
 
btw all these songs were credited to him, so I guess he might be only playing his own MM stuff. Based on this logic, hopefully he'll do some of these in the future:
 
seraph
APRÉS MIDI～あるパリの午後で～
偽りのmusetté
Madrigal
COLOR ME BLOOD RED
ILLUMINATI
Brise
月下の夜想曲
鏡の舞踏 幻惑の夜
地下水脈の迷路
 
The more poppy/laid-back stuff would translate really well to a stripped-down acoustic arrangement, but what I really wanna see is ILLUMINATI or COLOR ME BLOOD RED, haha.  

A lot can be said, positive and negative about the legacy of MALICE MIZER, whether it's the abrupt departure of Tetsu after just one year, the GACKT years, the untimely death of Kami or the rise and fall in the Klaha years. There's no better way to understand how MALICE MIZER went from unknown to legends of Visual Kei than to start in the beginning.
 
In the Beginning: The Era of Tetsu

 
MALICE MIZER was formed in August of 1992 when former guitarist of Matenrou, Közi joined forces with the support bassist Mana and the two recruited the former Ner-vous vocalist Tetsu, former ZE:RO bassist Yu~ki and former DATURA (not to be confused with DatuRΛ) drummer Gaz to form MALICE MIZER (a postmanteau of Malice and Misery) with a concept based on the darker side of human nature. MALICE MIZER immediately began activities and released their first demo tape SANS LOGIQUE which had foregone vocals and released Speed of Desperate on the compilation album Brain Trash which featured acts such as ALUCARD, DIE=KÜSSE, THE PIASS and Gazelle. Shortly after Brain TRASH, Gaz departed and Kami joined; Kami being the only other drummer for the band until his untimely death. MALICE MIZER released a few more demos before releasing their debut album memoire on Mana's newly founded label Midi:Nette. Tetsu then left the band at the end of 1994 with a live performance titled Cher de memoire II on December 27th.
 
Taking a Different Route: It's Gackt Time

 
MALICE MIZER went into 1995 without a vocalist, but they didn't let it stop their surge as they performed without a vocalist for a sponsored event titled Dai Goya Higeki no Bansan Vol.5 (第五夜 悲劇の晩餐 Vol.5) before Gackt officially joined the band as the new vocalist with his first performance on October 10th Karei naru Fukkatsugeki. The music of MALICE MIZER took a drastic turn and was the catalyst for the rise of Gackt as a performer and set the stage for his continued success after leaving the band as the band went from a Gothic sound to a more upbeat sound; something that became a signature of Gackt's solo career. In 1996 MALICE MIZER released their second album Voyage sans retour and underwent a nationwide one-man tour culminating in a show titled Sans retour Voyage deux 1996. MALICE MIZER continued their stride in 1997 when they signed a contract with major label Nippon Columbia, a subsidiary of Columbia Music Company as well as undergoing a sold-out nationwide tour with STANDING TOUR '97 Pays de merveilles ~空白の瞬間の中で~ and a regularly broadcast radio show MALICE MIZER no Mayonaka no s'il vous plaît on CBC Radio. Merveilles, MALICE MIZER's third album and second featuring Gackt as vocalist is released in March of 1998, the band announced merveilles ~Shuuen to kisuu~ in which the tickets sold out in just two minutes as well as undergoing a new radio show MALICE MIZER no shisetsu hisho no chojutsu on Chiba's renowned bay-fm radio station. However, things would take a turn when in January Gackt decided to leave the band at the peak of their popularity to form own solo project that he continues to this day, simply called GACKT featuring a backing band appropriately titled GACKTJOB. 
 
As if losing their vocalist wasn't bad enough tragedy struck when in June beloved drummer Kami passed away suddenly from a subarachnoid hemorrhage, more commonly referred to as a brain hemorrhage. With the world crashing down around his shoulders, Mana underwent damage control and returned MALICE MIZER to his own label. Malice Mizer went on to release one song after Gackt left, a piano song called Saikai no Chi to Bara. Little did they know that their fortunes were about to change as their savior was right around the corner.
 
From Rebirth to Climax: The Year of Klaha

 
PRIDE OF MIND former vocalist Klaha joined MALICE MIZER on vocals on August 31st and would be the third and final vocalist for the group. MALICE MIZER proceeded to get back to making music right away with the release of their fourth and final album Bara no Seidou and Klaha had his first live performance one week later with Bara ni irodorareta akui to higeki no makuake - Dai icihiya saikai no bara. Sadly, nothing lasts forever and after several singles, a feature length, albeit silent film Bara no Konrei ~Mayonaka ni Kawashita Yakusoku~ and even a concert DVD in 2001, MALICE MIZER went on an indefinite hiatus at the end of the year. Each member releasing their own respective personal messages regarding the hiatus on the bands official website.
 
Post Mortem: An Uncertain Future

 
After MALICE MIZER went on an indefinite hiatus the respective members were quick to move on to other projects, except for Yu~ki who's only activity since the hiatus was contributing to a song on Közi's solo project. The aforementioned Közi went on to be in a managare of bands, first with HARUHIKO ASH in Eve of Destiny, then started a solo project as well as XA-VAT, ZIZ, VAMQUET and joined Ryo from 9Goats Black Out to form a nu-goth band called DĂLLE. Mana quickly formed his own solo project that is still running strong today called Moi dix Mois and launched his own fashion label Moi-même-Moitie as well as becoming a producer for the band Schwarz Stein and cellist Kanon Wakeshima. Tetsu formed several bands of varying styles of music after leaving MALICE MIZER with the most notable being ZIGZO and Nil. Gackt has been active as a solo artist since leaving MALICE MIZER and subsequently ventured into film and television while Klaha released a solo mini-album and full length album before disappearing from the scene in 2004, not to be heard from again.
 
MALICE MIZER may be no more, but the pieces have come together several times since the hiatus, Közi joining Mana's Moi dix Mois in 2008 at Dis Inferno Vol.VI ~Last Year Party~ and again in 2009 for a two stop tour Deep Sanctuary; Deep Sanctuary becoming a staple event for Moi dix Mois from then on. Moi dix Mois and Közi went on another, longer tour in 2010, six shows aptly named Deep Sanctuary II which featured the return of Yu~ki on bass; the three reuniting on stage for the first time in nine years. The show featured MALICE MIZER classics such as Saikai no Chi to Bara and Beast of Blood as well as a cover of shock rocker Rob Zombie's What Lurks on Channel X. Moi dix Mois then held a tenth anniversary concert Le dixieme anniversaire Live 2011~2012　~Tetsugaku no Hahen Dainana Shou Shinen naru Seiiki Deep Sanctuary III~ which saw Közi performing with his new band ZIZ with Yu~ki returning on bass. Sadly the original drummer Gaz passed away on December 22nd 2017, one year before the bands 25th anniversary and the subsequent reunion show last year Deep Sanctuary Ⅵ MALICE MIZER 25th Anniversary Special which featured the return of the trio as well as former roadies for the band performing their own renditions of classic songs, such as former LAREINE vocalist KAMIJO joining for his own take on the Gackt era songs APRES MIDI and Bel Air ~Kuuhaku no Shunkan no Naka De~, cali≠gari's Shuuji with a riff on the Tetsu era's Kioku to Sora and ILLUMINATI as well as Moran former vocalist Hitomi with Gackt's Madrigal and N.p.s.N.g.s. The show featured ZIZ and Moi dix Mois performing their own songs and MALICE MIZER covers with the show ended with a tribute to the departed Kami and all of the guest vocalists singing together for Ma chérie ~Itoshii Kimi E~.
 
There have been teases for years and the band have come back in several shapes, but whether they will return with the likes of any of their three former vocalists is unlikely or at best up in the air with all of them seemingly content with their careers and lives and consider MALICE MIZER a part of their past. The future of MALICE MIZER is uncertain, but it's safe to say that the Visual Kei scene would be shaken to the core if the stars aligned and the malice and misery rose like a phoenix for a second time.
 
Member History
Current Lineup
Mana - Guitar (ex-Matenrou, Moi dix Mois) 
Közi - Guitar (ex-GIRL, ex-Matenrou, ZIZ, XA-VAT, DĂLLE, Solo, VAMQUET) 
Yu~ki - Bass (ex-ZE:RO)
Former Members
Gaz - Drums (ex-DATURA, deceased  2017)
Tetsu - Vocals (ex-Ner-vous, ZIGZO, Nil, THE JUNEJULYAUGUST) 
Kami - Drums (deceased 1999)
Klaha - Vocals (ex-PRIDE OF MIND, Solo, retired)
Gackt - Vocals (ex-Cains:Feel, Solo, YELLOW FRIED CHICKENz)
Support Members
Shue Sakai - Drums (ex-JACK BLUE, N.S.D.P., Everlasting-K)
Kazune - Keyboard (Brain Hacker, Art Cube)
Staff Members
Hitomi - Roadie (ex-Moran, UMIYURI) 
MAYU - Roadie (ex-LAREINE, ex-NEW SODMY)
MACHI - Roadie (ex-LAREINE, Chanton L'amour) 
Masanori Yabuki - Roadie (Datenshi Tokyo, Ant1nett) 
KAMIJO - Roadie (ex-LAREINE, ex-NEW SODMY, Versailles, Solo)
Shuuji Ishii - Roadie (cali≠gari, goatbed, EX-ANS)
 
Discography
 
Albums
(1994.07.24) memoire
(1996.06.09)Voyage ~Sans Retour~
(1998.03.18) Merveilles
(2000.08.23) Bara no Seidou (薔薇の聖堂)
Mini-albums
(2000.02.01) Shinwa (神話)
Demos
(1992.10.31) Sans Logique
(1993.04.05) Sadness
(1993.10.12) The 1th Anniversary
(1996.00.00) Après Midi
(1999.11.03) Saikai no Chi to Bara" (再会の血と薔薇)
Singles
(1995.12.10) Uruwashiki Kamen no Shoutaijou
(1996.10.10) Ma Chérie ~Itoshii Kimi E~
(1997.08.06) Bel Air ~Kuuhaku no Shunkan no Naka De~
(1997.12.03) Au Revoir
(1998.02.11) Gekka no Yasoukyoku
(1998.05.20) Illuminati
(1998.09.09) Le Ciel ~Kuuhaku no Kanata E~
(1999.11.03)Saikai no Chi to Bara
(2000.05.31) Kyomu no Naka de no Yuugi
(2000.07.26) Shiroi Hada ni Kuruu Ai to Kanashimi no Rondo
(2001.05.30) Gardenia
(2001.06.21) Beast of Blood
(2001.10.30) Mayonaka ni Kawashita Yakusoku
(2001.11.30) Garnet ~Kindan no Sono E~
 
OHP
Moi dix Mois 
Közi
Moi-même-Moitie
 
-A huge thanks to @inartisticand the great team over at vk.gy for a wealth of information that without, this would not have been possible.
 

eXcuse me, Yoshiki mastercard? How does it work? 

I can't believe a guy who's almost 55 doesn't know that putting whole ass eggs in the microwave makes them explode wtf

I found it scrolling my home feed on YouTube.

Me before watching: THERE'S A VIDEO?!?!
 
Me after: The fact that this even exists makes me want to commit toaster bath. I regret watching that. I have never seen something so cursed, and I miss 1 minute ago when I didn't know this existed.

Me before watching: THERE'S A VIDEO?!?!
 
Me after: The fact that this even exists makes me want to commit toaster bath. I regret watching that. I have never seen something so cursed, and I miss 1 minute ago when I didn't know this existed.

Me spending all my corona bucks on VK stuff like:
 

I found someone in the comments who tried the same 🙈
Well he did some good stuff back in the days.
Now he reminds me of some girl with too much money that is hot to get a pic with any celeb she mets and calls them all heir friends .... Or so... 
Oooor maybe its just a never ending midlife crisis  🤷
 

Prelayout for their new album 

Can't believe I missed this but he did another broadcast yesterday
https://live2.nicovideo.jp/watch/lv325385933
He talks about Corona being annoying, his blog, 911, the Yoshiki mastercard, the Yoshiki wine, Japanese curry, stuff like that. I like the English quiz he did in the middle of it.  Also like that one Japanese person who wrote "Where the fuck is the new album" but in Japanese [so politely]. Stream has a nice message though, I'll make sure to “ネットを通じて. "Even though we are apart our hearts are connected"
Yoshiki has confirmed that he will do another live broadcast for hide memorial day.
 
 

I can't believe a guy who's almost 55 doesn't know that putting whole ass eggs in the microwave makes them explode wtf

I can't believe a guy who's almost 55 doesn't know that putting whole ass eggs in the microwave makes them explode wtf

I can't believe a guy who's almost 55 doesn't know that putting whole ass eggs in the microwave makes them explode wtf

guysssss this is clearly a reference to that totally finished new album!!!!!!!
 
It's gonna be explosive! and FXXKIN SPICY!!!

I can't believe a guy who's almost 55 doesn't know that putting whole ass eggs in the microwave makes them explode wtf

I can't 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 why does he has to tell us stuff like that 
 

It's penis music lol. Okay, I'm not here to talk shit about pop music, especially not Kpop. There's more artistic merit to it than some give it, and many perfectly sane Kpop fans get unfairly lumped in with the Stans. 
 
But man, I used to be really neutral and happy towards Kpop back when I first got into VK, y'know, being like "Hey guys, let's all get along and talk music and have fun 🤗" but then some of them got into my DMs and completely disrespected my music taste, insisted that "It's all Asian, it's the same, so you should love BTS too or something's wrong with you weeb" and I even got into a fight with one because she said some super ignorant things about--not VK or the band--but just metal music in general (didn't help that she attacked Insanity Injection whom I really like but she said "this isn't music, it's people screaming into the mic" and so I just reversed the logic with "[Kpop] is not music, it's meaningless noise created for brainless consoomers"). All of this shit wasn't even on Twitter, it was on fucking anime Instagram posts and random or VK Youtube videos. And nothing, not even saying "I don't like western pop" or "I'm not fond of Jpop myself" calms them down. I've been called racist against Asians because I don't like Kpop--never mind the fact that I'm on this forum so that says something about what I think about Asian people--I'M FROM ASIA. I don't even pass for white more than like 25% of the time... Honestly, it just makes me more and more irate as the years go by, because I was so open minded about it and willing to be friendly and actually listen to their damn band recommendations. At this rate I'll be an unironic Anti before I'm legally old enough to pour my own drinks. 
 
That background is needed to understand my current stance. I did genuinely try to get into Kpop; I started with BTS like they all tell you to and I listened to about 5 different releases of theirs.
 
 I was far from impressed. They sounded behind the times. Not in a charming way, but in a way that made me feel... Uncomfortable? I recognized the electronica-infused choruses and hip-hop inspired verses from Western pop music and even some elements from 2010s fads like tropical house production [God I hated that fad] and asked myself "Why is this any better than the white people stuff?" I don't think it is. I think it's on par, personally. I think this stems from an issue Kpop fans have. They can't just call a mediocre album a mediocre album, or even acknowledge a bad song/album because of hype. It's all got to be amazing, flawless, like the second coming of Christ. Honestly, even bands I consider to be absolutely amazing have some songs I don't hype because they're a step in wrong direction or have questionable production choices, but when I say "Yeah, this album is pretty great, but stay away from track X Y Z, they're not the best" the person receiving my recommendation often finds it funny and listens anyway, and then we can have a laugh about how weird it was for a VK band to do Ska or for the vocalist to think that now's the time to try opera vocals for the first time in his life. Sometimes I even completely shit on a band I love because they're an acquired taste or have an endearing charm and originality that lacks any and all technical savoir-faire. 
 
 
Personally, I don't understand how anyone from any counterculture/alternative music group (wassup punks and Goths) could be really into something mainstream at the same time, I thought we gathered around this stuff because it was alternative and had messages in it that differ from the mainstream.  Sure, you could remark on all the Oshare bands that aren't particularly deep or meaningful to say that VK in general is artistically bankrupt but it also wouldn't be fair if I pretended that this whole scene is just deliciously layered social/political commentary like Diru or idiosyncratic cultural experimentalism like Guruguru Eigakan.  On the mainstream aspect, I mean, the mainstream kind of defines the space that creates a counterculture. It's not what they are. Well I mean, what's not mainstream is the they, and mainstream is the us. I think this sense of othering VK bands and fans experience is central to the culture's structure, as something that exists as a byproduct of failed standard conformation. 
 
 I don't know how some VK fans can up and leave for Kpop so quick. Maybe they just liked the Oshare stuff, I guess, but I can't believe they would leave behind all the great post-punk, experimental, speed metal, alt-rock, etc. groups behind when Kpop doesn't offer anything similar. When I listen to pop music, I long for that missing guitar solo, or lack of Jpop chords (if it's Western pop music). Also the PVs are completely different--least from what I see. Every Kpop group I've seen is good at dancing. Hella good. And I've been doing dance for 8 years of my life, I know good technique and stage presence when I see it. When I say that, you might be shocked to know that I still prefer VK PVs where the bandomen just stare at the camera and sulk, or dance around while playing guitar or something. There's been masterful executions of this simple formula, like in cali≠gari's 歪んだ鏡 which legit gave me nightmares of Hage Shuuji staring into my soul.  Might be a false positive because that song dredges some mental trauma other than his face but my point still stands. There's also a lot of PVs that don't have killer dance moves but have a lot of creative spirit to them, like BUCK-TICK's EMPTY GIRL or literally anything Malice Mizer filmed, and that's the stuff I like the most. I've lost interest in big-budget MVs, and prefer a smaller scale spectacle.

It depends on the band. I've said it about DeG, but in that case it's a shorthand way for me to say "they're too influenced by modern metal now for my taste, and modern metal is mostly awful because it tends toward the gimmicky and overproduced." I'm not saying western influences are intrinsically bad, just those particular western influences.
 
Rock wasn't invented in Japan, of course all vk is western influenced. But-despite the received wisdom that vk "isn't a sound"-it has certain musical signifiers running through its history that are unique to it. Like, you could erase a Madeth Gray'll song from everyone's collective memory, re-write it in English, and you could immediately tell just by listening to it that it doesn't sound like some American or British band wrote it. I guess maybe it could be mistaken for some unusually metallic-yet-poppy, ultra-theatrical goth rock, but even that's a stretch.
 
From my experience, in music and media in general, what looks like the most stalwart gatekeeping usually has experience and some well thought out thought processes behind it. At the end of the day, it's bad form to attach motives to other people's taste. "Elitists" could just as easily label you as being a "raving poptimist," having no discernment, or yadda yadda.