heresytrash

Turn on the game and then go to sleep with it on. This way you can take out your pent up anger on some guardians in a dream, and you'll be getting sleep at the same time. win/win.

they were on hiatus until 2020, their anniversary year, so idk yeah i guess??

Ah thanks for the insight, I'm sorry I didn't see it until now.  Let's just say this issue has been something on my mind for personal reasons, though I can see circumstances like @CAT5 where forgiveness is due. 
 
I won't go into much detail, but with certain events coming up it's on my mind again considering some events going on in my life. My mom thinks that they should be just forgive them and make up with the abuser, it's hard to convey to her that it'll probably never happen as he continues to play victim and not see the damage he has done. 

I however have seen the damage he has done, and I myself don't know if I can ever bring myself to forgive him for that. As for the victim, they're in a much happier place, getting married and buying a new house; they're definitely on the healing path without the need to have them in their life.

Ah thanks for the insight, I'm sorry I didn't see it until now.  Let's just say this issue has been something on my mind for personal reasons, though I can see circumstances like @CAT5 where forgiveness is due. 
 
I won't go into much detail, but with certain events coming up it's on my mind again considering some events going on in my life. My mom thinks that they should be just forgive them and make up with the abuser, it's hard to convey to her that it'll probably never happen as he continues to play victim and not see the damage he has done. 

I however have seen the damage he has done, and I myself don't know if I can ever bring myself to forgive him for that. As for the victim, they're in a much happier place, getting married and buying a new house; they're definitely on the healing path without the need to have them in their life.

I do want to clarify my stance a bit, so ppl don't get it twisted or misunderstand me. I take a Hebraic/Biblical approach to forgiveness, and from a Hebraic stance, everything requires an action (or actions) - so forgiveness isn't just some disembodied emotion or an intellectual exercise. For true forgiveness to take place, it must first be asked for. This seems like common sense, but it's hella important.
 
Secondly, true forgiveness requires restitution or restoration. So if you break my bike or something, then you can't give me a donut in return and expect me to forgive you. I have every right to withhold my forgiveness in that regard. Also, in terms of restoration, you have to go over and above in restoring whatever you took away or did damage to so that there are no hard feelings. So for example's sake: if someone steals your car, you're gonna be PISSED - but if that person restores not only the care they stole, but also buys you several more cars, then you're gonna be much more apt to not only forgive, but also to forget.
 
Thirdly, forgiveness requires repentance  - which essentially means to turn from your way. Cuz it makes absolutely no sense to ask forgiveness, and then to restore, only to do the same thing again. You haven't turned from your way in that case. You have to prove that you've turned a new leaf and aren't going to do whatever you did again. So forgiveness is neither free nor simply emotional, but it's a process that absolutely requires action.
 
This is forgiveness in its ideal state. But how many of us are living in a community or a country where the law is Torah? Where the law is righteousness itself? None of us are. So essentially, most of us are dealing with folks that don't give a fuck about forgiveness, or righteousness, or the evil that they do. So what do you do? What do you do when there's no path to forgiveness? What do you do when justice and restoration is impossible?
 
Well, it depends on your perspective and understanding of the world itself. For me, I understand that our creator is just and loves balance, and he will not be mocked - so everyone eventually reaps what they sow. This is where I feel bad for people that are overcome by wickedness because they often have no idea of the path that they're on. That, and people who are caught up in wickedness can change their ways. They're still gonna reap what they sowed, but they can still change their ways at some point. I'm proof of that myself. So I have empathy there, because i know i've been in darkness too. And still wrestle with it everyday.
 
So to close, no one is truly required to forgive, unless the requirements for forgiveness have been met. However, when those requirements cannot be met for whatever reason, for me personally, I find it best to fully experience the emotions associated with and let it go. To heal, essentially. Now that doesn't mean that i'm still going to fuck with whoever  transgressed against me, but at the same time, i'm not gonna let that person's actions weigh down my heart, and send me off into the kind of downwards spiral that @nekkichi mentioned.

I've just read somewhere this week that not getting proper justice on abusive/unjust situations will eventually invite a snowballing sequence of same events in one's life, and while I don't necessarily agree with it, looking back on my own life it is true with a good amount of people.
 
repressing hurt feelings because someone's brain worms only leave them with the love&light&free forgiveness paradigm doesn't sound right for me either.

I'm not gonna go too deeply into it, but I've been through some shite in my time and I can safely say that forgiveness was and still is the last thing on my mind. It's been over two years since any of it happened so I don't need to worry about it anymore, and I actually feel pretty great and more confident than ever now that it's over for good, but d'you know what? I didn't forgive anyone. I just look back and laugh at what awful, awful people they were and leave it at that. Way I see it, if you forgive them, you don't really learn anything and learning is the most vital thing you can do after something like that happens to you. Sure, I'm a bit colder than I once was but I know for a fact that if I told myself everything was okay and that those people were even worthy of licking the dirt on the underside of my boots, I would be too sweet for my own good. Forgiveness is an emotion, not an action, and I just don't feel it for certain people.

In my experience, forgiveness is a process and doesn't happen over night. I think it's ultimately  most healthy to forgive, but it can't be forced...like if you're angry...or sad...or whatever...feel all of that completely with no judgment, but don't stay stuck in those emotions. You'll end up bogging yourself down and staying chained to a dead situation.
 
And yeah, forgiving someone doesn't mean you condone what they did. Not at all.
 
One thing that's helped me to forgive all of those who have hurt or betrayed me is #1 I realized that i'm more than capable of doing some fucked up shit too (tho I actively try NOT to). And  #2 people who abuse/hurt others, whether intentionally or not, are all operating from a place of darkness/blindness/ignorance. And that's a very sad place to be in. You have to be in a very dark place to feel like it's ok to hurt others in any way. I feel bad for people like that, and I've learned to have compassion on them.
 
It's all too easy to become overwhelmed by evil in this world, and there are a lot of convincing reasons to choose evil. The opposite is often more difficult, but it's far more rewarding.
 
As the Messiah said, "forgive them; for they know not what they do".

Can't speak for everyone, but trying to ignore or put aside your feelings is always a stopgap measure. While forgiveness can be one method, there are many other ways to confront your feelings; I think confrontation (internal or external) has to be one of the steps to healing.
 
Also recognition/realization > rationalization. 

It's healthier to recognise your feelings and be at peace with them imo, regardless of what they are. 

i've done this twice, still don't feel bad

Always a tricky one when it comes to things like this.
Part of making decisions is accepting that it can make things better, or worse. You may see it (at least you should have seen this coming, no?) as a worst case thing, but later you may realize that it was a better decision overall, otherwise why think about reporting it in the first place?
 
Not sure what they were written up times before for (or this time), but if you had not done it, someone else would have. Keep that in mind.
 
 

Some people just need to get fired. It's probably worse keeping around a bad link than the small remorse you'll feel seeing him go.

@Gesuunfortunately no, I just sent him a meme in response to him bitching 

@psychonnect_rozen I just gagged a little 

@heresytrash The caption of that post I found is even worse:
 
"You were just shopping with your boyfriend Ruki. You were at your favorite store and your boyfriend Ruki was at his favorite store. You then heard a couple of men wolf whistling. You turn around and see a couple of guys staring at you and are saying dirty comments about you which made you disgusted. You started to get away from the boys but then you saw your boyfriend Ruki in the store with rage flaming in his eyes. You then got scared because seeing Ruki’s angry side is a lot scarier than seeing horror movies. Ruki walk towards to you and wraps his arms around you. He gave the boys that were flirting with you a death glare that made the boys all scared and run out of the store. “You okay there?” Ruki asked while he kisses you on the cheek. “Yeah I’m okay thank you for saving my life my knight and shining armor.” You smiled while you kiss him on the lips. “You know I don’t like it when guys stare at you which unleashes my angry devil side.” Ruki said. “I know dear. But seeing your angry side is sexy as hell.” You smirked while you kiss him on the cheek. Ruki smirks at you. “Just remember you belong to me and I belong to you.” Ruki whispered. “I already know that baby.” You smiled."
 
Just..no

Ruki stans are just as bad as bts stans 

I love you

A group called Starset. Not sure who they are, not sure if I will stay long enough for their set either honestly.

@Gesuunfortunately no, I just sent him a meme in response to him bitching 

Are you the legend they speak of? The one who memed him?

Neverending cycle for me lmao 

Exactly my thought process, lol xD

I believe one of the reasons they paused activities was to prepare for their 20th anniversary, which would be next year. So my guess is they'll be back around then.

they haven't officially disbanded but they probably should lol