Almost whupped a guy`s @$$ in the metro today.

[Tetora 625]

A bit of backstory, I drive, but usually just take public transport as it is cheaper and more convenient than driving.

 

So there I was, getting into the metro, and there is a delay. So I go sit down after a long day, and lo-and-behold to my right there is this guy telling this woman off to my right... He is in her face, and talking in Chinese so I am confused, and don`t really know what is going on...

 

I am thinking to myself that I should go stop this, but I don`t know what is happening, maybe she actually did something bad, etc... Or maybe it isn`t what I am thinking it is...

 

Anyway the train comes, and I get in, they get in the next car, and it is packed so I can`t see them... But I have this twisting in my stomach, I feel like I was wrong and should have stopped him...

 

Luckily, they get off at my stop, and I trail them... He is still going off on her, and her head is down... My blood boils, and I go up to him, shove him with the force of Goku himself, and ask him what the f*** he is doing...

 

He says he is just talking to her, and he looks like he is going to make a move on me... I am ready to unleash.

 

 

I shove him again, and tell him he shouldn`t talk to her like that, it`s not right.

 

He says sorry, it`s his ex-girlfriend.

 

I say I don`t care, you shouldn`t talk to her like that, and you should say sorry to her, not me...

 

I am one second away from just starting to beat on him if he says anything else or try to keep talking to her, so I make him go back the way he came, and he does, pitifully.

 

I start talking to the girl, saying she shouldn`t take that from anyone, and she just smiles and says thanks...

 

Everybody is looking at me, and a lady comes up to shake my hand, etc... I feel good about what I did, I was pumped up and felt like a champ... but at the same time...

 

It feels so wrong, like she wont let make it stop, and it will keep going on... Like all I did was postpone it...

 

I hate it, I hate people like that, and I never ever want to be like that. At the same time, I hate that he is Chinese, and acts like that, and he is so much of a coward that he can only talk like that to a small woman, and b*tches out when I get in his face. Like China has this rich history, and overcame so much, and had martial artists defending their villages, and putting their lives on the line against evil dynasties, and had good emperors trying to defend China, and all that happened, and we still have chickensh*ts like this coming out of the great country. Tbh I would have loved to use the martial arts my Sifu taught me to beat the hell out of this guy...

[Biopanda 2675]

Monochrome Livejournal and/or STDH.txt

 

Voting thread 10/10 would read again

[Miasma 162]

It may not seem like it to those outside, but leaving an abusive relationship is really hard. Thank you for doing what you did. Hopefully that woman will get the help she needs.

 

 

  ...but holy shit did your post get really racist really quick. not cool dude

[nullmoon 784]

I'm confused, you wanted to beat up a guy because he was in his ex-girlfriend's face? That doesn't sound healthy, dude XD

Obviously I wasn't there so I don't know the ins and outs but surely it's their own business? Plus there's good and bad in every culture, so I'm not sure why Chinese people would be excluded from being assholes just because of their history. As someone who is half-Chinese and a bit of an asshole I can definitely vouch for this

[Tetora 625]

The way he was talking to her and treating her was clearly abusive when we got off the metro, he was starting to yell right in her face and trying to control her, and her head was down, scared. I wont stand for that.

As for the Chinese part, I wasnt trying to be racist, I love China and its history and used to train in an all Chinese dojo. My sifu told me all sbout the history of martial arts and China, and how brave the people were and I love it. Because of that it makes me angry not only at the person as an individual, but of not representing the greatness he is from. Your lineage survived famine, corruption, and the killing of anyone who.defended your village or practiced martial arts period, and you are going to abuse a small beautiful woman and then apologize and run away from me?

Every country has its history of greatness and courage, and people shouldnt forget that.

Maybe I am unrealistic, but I hate that, and feel as if I did the right thing.

And yeah I hope that never happens again to that woman and wish it would never to happen to any other vulnerable people.

[Senedjem 510]

it still looks like ur saying 'he was chinese therefore he should have been an honourable ninja warlord' and that's just the dumbest shit ever

sorry 

[digi 192]

hahah, what is this

[JukaForever 758]

It's a nice act and you clearly had good intentions but you shouldn't have laid hands-on first. If you really did train from martial artists then you should know physical violence should be the last resort, not the first.

 

BTW, it is normal for Chinese people to have such loud conversations, for foreigners it can sound aggressive and when it actually isn't.

[Archaic 14]

The way he was talking to her and treating her was clearly abusive when we got off the metro, he was starting to yell right in her face and trying to control her, and her head was down, scared. I wont stand for that.

As for the Chinese part, I wasnt trying to be racist, I love China and its history and used to train in an all Chinese dojo. My sifu told me all sbout the history of martial arts and China, and how brave the people were and I love it. Because of that it makes me angry not only at the person as an individual, but of not representing the greatness he is from. Your lineage survived famine, corruption, and the killing of anyone who.defended your village or practiced martial arts period, and you are going to abuse a small beautiful woman and then apologize and run away from me?

Every country has its history of greatness and courage, and people shouldnt forget that.

Maybe I am unrealistic, but I hate that, and feel as if I did the right thing.

And yeah I hope that never happens again to that woman and wish it would never to happen to any other vulnerable people.

You aren't chinese right?

You seem to have this high respect for mainland chinese people where in fact it should be the opposite.

Most chinese people have no manners, and are EXTREMELY, extremely rude (I'm talking about Chinese born and raised in China).

So many Japanese think that chinese foreigners in Japan are god awful rude too.

Most chinese, not all. But this is only based on much personal experience.

You shouldn't have pushed the guy, just asked him to stop doing it. What if the guy knocked you out after pushing him?

The world appreciates your concern though, just try to be more careful next time,

if you had really exercised martial arts, you would have learned to exercise and control your anger.

Martial arts is also a mental discipline

[Tetora 625]

it still looks like ur saying 'he was chinese therefore he should have been an honourable ninja warlord' and that's just the dumbest shit ever

sorry

Well, clearly ninja came from Japan and usually worked for shogunate , and weren't warlords, so if you somehow took my heat of the moment rant that people should have more pride as me implying that, then I can see your cause for concern. Thanks for your eloquent input.

Also Juka, I see what you are saying, although the belief ground into me was more, only use it if neccesary, and I only really push ed him, and I doubt any amount of training would make me not want to open a can of whup-ass, but it is more like I want to, but resolve the situation with less force if possible.

Like I am thinking of what would happen if I didnt push him off her or assert myself, and I dont think I like that scenario.

I really appreciate the opinion though.

[JukaForever 758]

Well "when necessary" as in when you see obvious physical violence. If you truly think you would do the same even with more training, then you need more training, maybe proper training. Some Sifus apparently ease the difficulty in training to keep the business running. Particularly, physical training is very important where you get punched in the face, your nose is numb for a week and your arms tremble from the strikes and blocking...then you see your sparring partner is an average built Asian and you have at least 20-40 lbs on him -.- I don't want to delve deep into the philosophy but you could assert yourself with words and not physical violence.

 

Idk where the event exactly that took place, at least it was a Chinese dude and not other else you could have been cited for physical harm as you instigated contact. Just take precaution when you do physical contact even if it is justifiable. 

 

I agree with Archaic as it somewhat resembles my experience with Chinese people as well studying in a university that is about 60% Chinese and maybe about half of those are FOBs. I don't have a firm grasp on what part of China they are from if I just met them but, for FOBs, some are terrible to uncivilized and some are cool to friendly.

[Tetora 625]

Well "when necessary" as in when you see obvious physical violence. If you truly think you would do the same even with more training, then you need more training, maybe proper training. Some Sifus apparently ease the difficulty in training to keep the business running. Particularly, physical training is very important where you get punched in the face, your nose is numb for a week and your arms tremble from the strikes and blocking...then you see your sparring partner is an average built Asian and you have at least 20-40 lbs on him -.- I don't want to delve deep into the philosophy but you could assert yourself with words and not physical violence.

 

Idk where the event exactly that took place, at least it was a Chinese dude and not other else you could have been cited for physical harm as you instigated contact. Just take precaution when you do physical contact even if it is justifiable. 

 

I agree with Archaic as it somewhat resembles my experience with Chinese people as well studying in a university that is about 60% Chinese and maybe about half of those are FOBs. I don't have a firm grasp on what part of China they are from if I just met them but, for FOBs, some are terrible to uncivilized and some are cool to friendly.

Simply put, pushing someone away from a woman he is putting his hands on and in the face of, is not extranneous or innapropriate. Once the situation reaches a certain point, physical contact is warranted, and I cant simply just say something about it, that would do.nothing.

As for me needing more training, I dont know anyone that woulf say they have trained enough... And if.more training leads me to not stepping in when a woman is being abused, something is wrong with my training. And more training will not lead to me being some mythical grandmaster who wouldnt want to beat the guy up, keyword being want. I could have just laid into.him right away thebmoment I saw he was abusing her, but I didnt. The court system the way it is I would not expect to go to jail for pushing a guy off a woman he was abusing or for hitting him back if he hit me, esp. With a large mass of witnesses on my.side.

As for my dojo it ran off donations only, no membership, and I was the only non-Chinese admitted, it is the furthest thing from a McDojo . It was also full contact the first day, and everyone weight trained.

You make good points and honestly I can see where everyone is coming from with their individual points, but I feel like I did the right thing, and am not going to feel guilty about helping an abused woman. I also do not wish to argue about this. Thanks for reading and posting.

[Yuuko 76]

It's admirable, to a degree, until you start putting yourself in harms way. Then it's stupid, it doesn't look brave or courageous when you're on the floor bleeding. Nobody is a superhero. I went through a period in my late teens of feeling helpless and angry at how people are treated in this world, so I'd often attempt to defend strangers if I saw obvious violent confrontation, usually with words, but it always turns to physical violence very quickly. I had the shit kicked out of me countless times, often by groups of 3 or more. For what? After all that, I only managed to help two people in total. One homeless guy getting beat on by a crack head (to which I was so fortunate a bunch of friends cut in since I was probably about to get stabbed), and then a cashier in a small super market late at night who randomly was being dragged over the counter by his throat. Even then I thought I'd successfully gotten away with helping him, alas I got jumped by the same guy and 4 of his 'boys' when I was waiting at my bus-stop a few minutes later. In the end it looked to everyone like I showed a complete disregard for my own well-being, and in turn a disregard for how much my friends/girlfriend loved me and cared for me. It's not nice to look back on.

Obviously I'm not saying you're batshitcrazyheromode like I was back then, but things can very quickly escalate even with the politest of words and calm manner.

 

My point is, I don't think there is ever any glory in an act of physical violence. I know it was a push, but a push can send someone from pretty calm to seriously aggravated in literally a single second.
It's good to help somebody, but I don't think it has anything to do with knowing martial arts. It's just morally right to try and help somebody who is potentially in trouble.

But if it's a relationship thing, sometimes it's worth keeping your nose out. I've also been charged and punched in the face by a stranger, dragged to the floor and screamed at "WHAT THE F**K ARE YOU DOING?!" whilst another pulled my girlfriend back, because me and my girlfriend were having a little play-fight on the side walk whilst waiting for some friends who were in a shop, but from a distance these two guys couldn't see us laughing. That shook up my girlfriend a bit.. So.. Just be careful.
Lastly, you're bound to get criticized somewhat more than getting gratifying responses when you post about it on the internet.
If you felt you did the right thing, good on you, we have no idea what it was really like. Peace.

[nullmoon 784]

I don't get where the 'abuse' is coming from? I'm so confused; how does talking loudly and being in someone's face equate to abuse?

[JukaForever 758]

Damn Yuuko, you got basically some of the worst possible outcomes for trying to do good.

 

 

I don't get where the 'abuse' is coming from? I'm so confused; how does talking loudly and being in someone's face equate to abuse?

It is verbal abuse and can be demeaning to a person as a human being.

[Flash-Fab-Supernova 88]

You probably didn't solve anything by pushing the guy. If anything the only thing you changed was the extent of the possible abuse she will receive from him later. I bet you embarrassed the guy enough that he'll take it out on her with his own "force of Goku." 

 

Maybe this topic should be moved to Toasted Waffles since it will fit the theme going on there~.

[RoseOfHizaki 131]

Usually/Normally/personally - I wouldnt poke my nose into their business. Its not down to you to play the judge on their behalf. I know that verbal abuse is still a abuse but so long as he didnt raise a hand and beat her then I wont decide to take action on my own accord - You dont know their situation and you didnt understand the language. You have no idea what they were arguing about and if it would have resulted in her getting her ass beat when the couple got home.

 

If the argument carries on raging then you could ask the guy to calm down and not make too much of a scene - They're in public, everything he says and does can be seen by everyone else even though they might not understand what they are shouting at each other about.

 

If the guy turns around and starts getting leary with you then shrug it off - Because It really is none of your business and youre interrupting them. The guys obviously gonna be very rude to you and well within his right. But if you keep pushing them to calm down you can take the heat off the girl and he will focus on you. In which case if he throws a punch then you can put him on the tarmac but you NEVER initiate the fight, NEVER. but that doesnt stop you being all up in his face about it trying to gain aggro and calm the situation down.

 

Never initiate the fight unless he tries to hit the girl or hit you. Because even though you intervened, The guy could press charges if the cops are called. While the cops might sympathise with you and understand what you tried to do, youre still taking the law into your own hands regardless  of the situation 

 

Im not telling you to sit there and do nothing, but be a little smart and try to manipulate the situation that way if it does come to fistycuffs then you will be in a safer position because you can say it was self defence - you will have the moral high ground in court.

 

 

Otherwise speak to the guy, tell him to calm down, If he blows you off constantly but wont attack you then report him to the closest police patrol for Domestic Violence and leave it to them to do something about it.

[Archaic 14]

To conclude anything I would just say you have more of an American culture upbringing rather than say,

a Japan or HK culture.

Americans or westerners like to exert themselves and intervene, and are loud

and decisive.

I think if you posted this on a more "American" forum you would

have much more positive feedback

[Raburr7 1268]

I have been into and also witnessed similar situations but with people i know, never with random strangers so i wouldnt know much but just thought of replyin for one reason. guys that verbally/physically abuse girls should be fuckin dealt with in any way.

 

im not gonna reminisce about my own stuff just express what i think about what Tetora did from what i can assume from what he wrote.

 

I believe no matter what martial art you study or whatever else that includes physical contact if i was in a similar situation (im gonna judge based on what i would do ) i would do the same exact thing you did. Shove the guy away from the girl or if he isnt too close to her go and stand in front of her / move her a bit away and then deal with the guy (well depends on the situation, i might do even more but i cant say since i wasnt the one who experienced it)

 

First of all i would check the guy out. what i mean is before you get into a fight with a total stranger you must at least check the basics and then proceed with caution. body type/height/any visible object like knife,knuckles etc is what i always notice first and then depends on the situation i will either make the first move or wait for the other person to make the first move if im about to fight him. otherwise if you see that you are physically superior (or at least you think so....) you can just try to scare him off  but always with caution in case he might punch you / kick you/ knee you /grab you etc out of the blue Of course if you are set on bein violent you just attack him without havin noticed you and beat him up till he cant stand up and move the girl away (well this is a bit extreme but you never know )

 

The other way around though, if you see that you might potentially lose the fight if it gets to that in my case i would proceed even if i was about to get beaten to protect the girl,would tell her to run away or somethin dunno ;p just sayin since i have never got beaten to a pulp in my life, just punches that didnt drop me unconscious and gave me bruises

 

Anyways, i wont analyze every possibility of a situation like dat so in this case if you felt (from what i understood ;p) that you could whoop his ass i think its unfortunate that you didnt if you saw that the guy showed no remorse or anythin for what he did because he is likely to do it again and worse.

 

btw for people sayin violence isnt everythin, you can solve problems with talkin bla bla A guy that would physically/verbally abuse his girl/a girl/any girl out in the public just imagine what he would in in private >.< what you gonna go say to him? this is wrong, dont do it again ok because its bad? bye have a nice day......

 

( i wont even talk about situations which involve many guys and not just one doin same or worse shit )

[Nyasagi 259]

I think it's a bad idea to do something if you don't understand the situation well. If the man hit her or anything, then it would be the reason to do something, but it seemed they were arguing? You never know what happened between them, maybe she did something, made him angry and felt guilty, so it looked like that? If you don't have a proof, don't judge someone... and even if it was abuse, you could make him even more angry like that. What if he hurt the girl more when no one else was looking?

 

Also, it's nice and good for your ego to play a hero, but I'm pretty sure other people aren't worth this, because they only think about themselves. Unless it's something really bad, or they're close to you, it's pointless to care about them, because they wouldn't care about you.

[Archaic 14]

I think it's a bad idea to do something if you don't understand the situation well. If the man hit her or anything, then it would be the reason to do something, but it seemed they were arguing? You never know what happened between them, maybe she did something, made him angry and felt guilty, so it looked like that? If you don't have a proof, don't judge someone... and even if it was abuse, you could make him even more angry like that. What if he hurt the girl more when no one else was looking?

Also, it's nice and good for your ego to play a hero, but I'm pretty sure other people aren't worth this, because they only think about themselves. Unless it's something really bad, or they're close to you, it's pointless to care about them, because they wouldn't care about you.

Exactly, for all you know, the guy was angry because the girl cheated on him,

I would dare not intervene if I could not understand what was happening

[Guest MollyMouse]

As good as it is to stop a dick from being a dick , you really should be careful sometimes :w: cause it is true that he most likely was worse with the abuse later on. If she is his ex , then he had no place to be yelling at her , but it seems as though she doesn't want to fight back! I hope she is ok now though!

Also yes ummm there are people like that in every culture :w: I'm just saying what everyone else is saying basically lol

[kai_desu 340]

[ginHigure 22]

You did a good thing, and you are entitled to your opinion end of story, dont let anyone change how you feel towards "bullying" as strong as you feel. You may have said what you said out of anger - understandable.