random thoughts thread

[jiji94 78]

18 minutes ago, MyakuHaku said:

You know, I never really thought about the courage thing when I wanted to cut my hair short, shave it for a deathhawk, shave off my eyebrows and show up to school the next day with none drawn on. Didn't really really regret any of it. Yea I argued with mom on the hair thing but shaving my eyebrows I just did in my room bc I got bored and wanted to do more with makeup  

That's actually pretty cool! Luckily my family wouldn't care at all if I cut my hair or changed my style. They're pretty great. I used to have very short hair many years ago and was kind of relentlessly teased for it and grew it out. Long hair was super cute on me but it made me miserable.

 

In my case, I struggle a lot with what is probably gender dysphoria and just accepting that I'm not happy being a "woman" or whatever that really means. 

[Tatsusalt 47]

5 minutes ago, jiji94 said:

That's actually pretty cool! Luckily my family wouldn't care at all if I cut my hair or changed my style. They're pretty great. I used to have very short hair many years ago and was kind of relentlessly teased for it and grew it out. Long hair was super cute on me but it made me miserable.

 

In my case, I struggle a lot with what is probably gender dysphoria and just accepting that I'm not happy being a "woman" or whatever that really means. 

Ouh I know about dysphoria haha. But I really don't think I am a man or woman even tho I am considered transman : / 

[jiji94 78]

9 minutes ago, MyakuHaku said:

Ouh I know about dysphoria haha. But I really don't think I am a man or woman even tho I am considered transman : / 

Yooo you're not the only person I've talked to who feels that way. Actually, when I was really confused about my gender identity I messaged a friend of mine who is transgender and he told me how for himself his perception of gender has continued to change and that internally he does not consider himself male or female. He definitely helped me make sense of myself. 

 

Anyway, I've been in denial about my gender identity for pretty much the past decade or so? It took until having a breakdown while talking to my ex because being forced into a gender role was driving me up the wall. 

[Tatsusalt 47]

12 minutes ago, jiji94 said:

Yooo you're not the only person I've talked to who feels that way. Actually, when I was really confused about my gender identity I messaged a friend of mine who is transgender and he told me how for himself his perception of gender has continued to change and that internally he does not consider himself male or female. He definitely helped me make sense of myself. 

 

Anyway, I've been in denial about my gender identity for pretty much the past decade or so? It took until having a breakdown while talking to my ex because being forced into a gender role was driving me up the wall. 

Yeah I mean I do plan on doing physical transition to some extent but don't really wanna be considered a boy or girl, I think it's androgyne? 

 

And yea I get that kind of, I came out to my family without even thinking about it until my grandma called me mentally ill. Now my uncle always talks about "In order to be a man you have to..." and list a bunch of masculine things and even stupid shit like hand veins are essential for being masculine? (I like them and all but I don't think they are a masculine characteristic) But yea I get a lot of nasty comebacks when I say I don't really want to be a very masculine man. I think Femme boy is more me? 

[suji 8317]

Don't give a fuck what anyone else says, just be you. The stigma against trans people is so fucking disheartening, and these naysayers just need to mind their own business and let people live their own fucking lives.

 

I don't really know if I struggle with dysphoria myself (I'm fine with my genitals although I hate periods more than anything so I wouldn't call myself trans), but I have struggled with being either masc or femme. I was forced to be real feminine for all my childhood until I graduated high school, and when I started college, I started dressing more butch and even got to cut my hair short which was a lifelong dream for me tbh. Now a couple years later, I've actually started wearing makeup (another thing that I never really got to do during my childhood), and I'm developing an interest in feminine fashion that I didn't really pay much attention to before, like lolita, and I'm pretty much entering that period where I wanna be femme again ;w; I just have to grow my hair out first since dresses don't really look good on me with having short hair and I kinda wanna lose weight too. orz

[jiji94 78]

10 minutes ago, MyakuHaku said:

Yeah I mean I do plan on doing physical transition to some extent but don't really wanna be considered a boy or girl, I think it's androgyne? 

 

And yea I get that kind of, I came out to my family without even thinking about it until my grandma called me mentally ill. Now my uncle always talks about "In order to be a man you have to..." and list a bunch of masculine things and even stupid shit like hand veins are essential for being masculine? (I like them and all but I don't think they are a masculine characteristic) But yea I get a lot of nasty comebacks when I say I don't really want to be a very masculine man. I think Femme boy is more me? 

Yah, totally get that. And wtf about your family?? I'm lucky when I was a kid my mom sat me down and explained what transgender meant to me. I live in a very small town but at least four or five people in my age group are openly trans/non-binary.

 

I identify as genderqueer tbh I wouldn't say I'm trans but it's possible..?

[Tatsusalt 47]

13 minutes ago, sheepprincessgara said:

Don't give a fuck what anyone else says, just be you. The stigma against trans people is so fucking disheartening, and these naysayers just need to mind their own business and let people live their own fucking lives.

 

I don't really know if I struggle with dysphoria myself (I'm fine with my genitals although I hate periods more than anything so I wouldn't call myself trans), but I have struggled with being either masc or femme. I was forced to be real feminine for all my childhood until I graduated high school, and when I started college, I started dressing more butch and even got to cut my hair short which was a lifelong dream for me tbh. Now a couple years later, I've actually started wearing makeup (another thing that I never really got to do during my childhood), and I'm developing an interest in feminine fashion that I didn't really pay much attention to before, like lolita, and I'm pretty much entering that period where I wanna be femme again ;w; I just have to grow my hair out first since dresses don't really look good on me with having short hair and I kinda wanna lose weight too. orz

I find it quite disturbing when someone is all "To be a man...." or "To be a woman...", especially when it is to someone that they don't really know. Why do you want to know so badly what surgeries they are gonna get? Why are you trying to choose their daily routine when you aren't really gonna see them again. When it comes to family it is pretty much the same, just don't bother, I will move out and never talk to you again then.  

[Tatsusalt 47]

6 minutes ago, jiji94 said:

Yah, totally get that. And wtf about your family?? I'm lucky when I was a kid my mom sat me down and explained what transgender meant to me. I live in a very small town but at least four or five people in my age group are openly trans/non-binary.

 

I identify as genderqueer tbh I wouldn't say I'm trans but it's possible..?

I kinda expected what my grandma said, but my uncle and mom were unexpected. They never really spoke against it and I kind expected them to not care or say much. My mom was so against it too, like my grandma using the whole Christian argument lol. 

[platy 3018]

I'm so indecisive it literally affects every aspect of my life to a high extent. 

 

-mega sigh-

[Tatsusalt 47]

7 minutes ago, platy said:

I'm so indecisive it literally affects every aspect of my life to a high extent. 

 

-mega sigh-

Honestly me too, I had that struggle at the end of last school year, continue going to school or do online schooling. At least I made a somewhat less stressful choice xD

[violetchain 912]

Today has been weird. Suddenly really wanted to listen to Tigertailz's "Young and Crazy" album, which led me to look up what some of the hair metal/sleaze rock bands I used to follow are doing now, and somehow that led to finding out that Tripp Eisen from Dope/Static-X randomly started performing again last year. 

 

Apparently he's playing reunion shows with Roughhouse, the hair metal band he was in back in the 80s. It's a really weird sight. The rest of the members look like they could be in Dokken, but he looks just like he did in Dope - almost like a hologram from 1998. It's kind of unnerving. Can't deny that I'm impressed he can still move like that in his 50s though.

 

 

[chocobuzz 752]

I'm always trying to save as much money as possible so I mostly only buy the cheapest kinds of groceries I can find. There's usually not that much quality difference between some cheap brands and expensive brands in some basic grocery things anyway, so it's always been fine. But today I made a huge mistake and bought the cheapest coffee I could find in our local supermarket.

 

This coffee is so bad it only tastes like sadness.

[Aferni 2381]

I want to scream at everyone and everything omfg

[violetchain 912]

The latest video is so much fun. Might need to check out that new RIZE album.

 

 

[Tatsusalt 47]

Honestly, I hate being around people but yet I want to go to a con and do a group VK cosplay. 

[AwesomeNyappy 98]

A party full of neo nazis is now the third strongest party in our parliament. Why? Because people are stupid and obviously we never learn from past mistakes. We haven't had any far-right parties in our parliament in decades, and now this shit. Fear and stupidity are our worst enemies, I guess.

[jiji94 78]

For some weird reason, every time I hear Takuya from The Oral Cigarettes talk I'm always so shook at how deep his voice is.

[Tatsusalt 47]

10 minutes ago, jiji94 said:

For some weird reason, every time I hear Takuya from The Oral Cigarettes talk I'm always so shook at how deep his voice is.

I am always  shooketh  I hear Tatusurou sing but I am always quaking when I hear him scream or growl

[jiji94 78]

7 minutes ago, MyakuHaku said:

I am always  shooketh  I hear Tatusurou sing but I am always quaking when I hear him scream or growl

Yeah, Tatsurou's another with a deep voice. Takuya's is just so, sooo deep when he talks that it doesn't seem like that type of voice would come out. lol

 

Kind of like when I first heard Isshi from Kaggra talk. There was such a huge contrast between how he spoke and how he sang. First time I heard him talk I think I almost flung my laptop across the room.

[Tatsusalt 47]

5 minutes ago, jiji94 said:

Yeah, Tatsurou's another with a deep voice. Takuya's is just so, sooo deep when he talks that it doesn't seem like that type of voice would come out. lol

 

Kind of like when I first heard Isshi from Kaggra talk. There was such a huge contrast between how he spoke and how he sang. First time I heard him talk I think I almost flung my laptop across the room.

First time I hear Tatsurou talk I cried. I also really like Klaha's voice but I don't think I will ever hear him sing again since he basically disappeared :< At least we have was has been put out there.  

[Zeus 7997]

So what is it called when your mood goes from happy to legit pissed in 0.5 seconds for no reason?

[suji 8317]

13 minutes ago, Zeus said:

So what is it called when your mood goes from happy to legit pissed in 0.5 seconds for no reason?

bipolar disorder

[JukaForever 758]

I was gonna say triggered but there was no reason

Edited September 29, 2017 by JukaForever

[jiji94 78]

Realizing today that I'm a bread sexual.

[Tatsusalt 47]

I realized a couple days ago I am Tatsurou's voice would it be Tatsuvoice? sexual