x_dak_x

every now and then I get pissed as fuck wondering how the hell I let all those red flags slide. how helpless I became putting my life into the hands of another, who told my parents they had nothing to worry about, that he was to going to take care of me. how he fucked up my life and nearly destroyed me. and yet despite this I was brainwashed and tried my hardest to keep caring and loving for him. how I accepted his daily horrible behavior towards me as normal. how I desensitized myself into accepting fault and punishment all the time. how am I getting over it? I guess by speaking my mind and reflecting. raging whenever because for the past 2+ years I was expected to keep silent and obedient... three things I keep in mind, who was their when I needed them the most, who abandoned me, and who caused me more trouble. It really goes to show, who your real friends are. I randomly fell for the most amazing guy now, who is on the same level of understanding as I. listens, respects, is mature and understanding... and above all genuinely caring. It's strange and new for me, but this is real love. not being treated like some puppet or toy to play with I honestly think this new guy could be the one.

because every girl holding a cigarette you consider badass. I hope you die of lung cancer /throws up you try way too fucking hard to fit the badboy image....do you actually enjoy being a douche? after treating others and me horrible, you'd say: that's not the true me, I'm sorry--yet, continue being a jerk. maybe you're confused and will eventually come out of the closet...afterall you liked: justin bieber, disney channel shows, gossip girl-type shows, my little pony, chick flicks, teen choice awards, crappy pop singers. remember 'it's friday' song? your closet costs way more than my regular clothes, shoes + costumes combined. you shop 24/7 for clothes.. pms-ing all day, every day..... and for the record, styling your short hair shouldn't take longer then me. you make fun of cooking and makeup, yet are highly critical in those areas checking up on blogs. just...woooow

that's a shame... the book cover design and packaging look amazing. I'd probably buy it anyways to put into my book collection. not like I haven't used spray paint in a closed room before anyways. nothing to loose...

procrastinating... need to design costume concepts, makeup, hairpieces, organize a work-back schedule... model#1 makeup theme (a in 3 different variations: 3 photos will be taken (one set) makeup theme (b in 3 different variations: 3 photos will be taken (one set) makeup theme (c in 3 different variations: 3 photos will be taken (one set) model#2 shoot #1: body painting shoot #2: completely different makeup theme model# 3&4 dgaf no more.....too much to do

first half was good. onto the second half... bring on the elf ears. I'm quite disappointed the lead female character has changed from being strong.. to caged.

THIS I need to see.... can't believe I missed it.

a gift for my younger sister.

rinkaku: this is difficult. I loved the instrumental composition. at times I loved PARTS of the instrument/singing combo... and other I absolutely hated the singing altogether. kiri to mayu (rinkaku): ok I'll admit, I'm totally biased. I had a deathcore/black metal/screamo phase back in day. this really felt like a dejavu... bit iffy at the beginning, but by the end it so grew on me. bit sloppy/all over the place though. Rinkaku Eternal Slumber Mix (Remixed by Akira Yamaoka) I don't mind a bit* of kyo's higher pitched singing.. but an entire song with it is over-kill... whinny and annoying. I like this version better than the original though

excited for this one. they've been a hit/miss lately though *for me

I can understand where you are coming from, having done so myself leaving a 2+ year one. It feels good doesn't it? stay strong and never look back! *big hug*

I still like my old school playlist. I guess it makes a difference genuinely liking a bands music versus only their looks. however it's not the only type of music I listen to.

It's a matter of opinion. Changed, yes it has. Trends come and go, replaced. Died in your opinion perhaps because the type of music you once were into has many if not all disbanded or evolved. Also to note are the more underground bands versus the mainstream. and the many different types of visual music represented in different categories.

Kissing you was equivalent to kissing a dirty toilet seat. No amount of cologne or mints could mask the smell which made me want to throw up daily. With your destroyed taste buds I doubt you could tell how bad your breath and clothes stunk. It's sad seeing someone deteriorate before your eyes. their skin aging rapidly, body and face becoming disgustingly thin. never again will I date a smoker. ps: pure hell if they attempt quitting. not missing you one bit.

friend having a second child. co-worker/friend giving birth to twins soon. another close friend getting married in a few months...

stumbled on the perfect video for my ex.... aka what the fuck are you trying to say I swear he was the embodiment of a typical girl stereotype... not even 'creative' speech. he'd be making no fucking sense. whine, whine, whine....good lord "you don't understand me." /more like teen angst in a 27yo http://ed.ted.com/on/OB5OlYAI

at loss of words. my friend revealed to me she has cancer. an amazingly caring, thoughtful, and respectful person. why her?

wtf... you contact me now, after 3 years, to do a photoshoot with me (as the model) =_=

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid ... =3&theater so random, but glad to have met you. cheers to 4 months of knowing you~ to those many chats, adventures and cozy nights~ you always cheer me up

ted & anger management LOL

skimming the daily news....wow I didn't expect this. super excited though!

saw this: http://9gag.com/gag/6141137 reminded me of someone....LOL

my old co-worker's drunk/high ramblings on fb.... quite entertaining since he's very intelligent. it's like poetry based on facts....actual authors, intellects and philosophers. I hope he's ok....... another one of those fml school is over type of moments it seems.

gotta check out the new one.... not too pleased of the character design change but... hmm

bri cheese on oatmeal cookies

super princess peach..... until I accidentally erased my entire file =_= equivalent to the time my computer crashed when I was working on a graphic design quote.. and I never hit save once =_=