1:00 AM
I'm awake again.
Those thoughts are rolling into my head,
My body feels dead.
I push these memories out one by one but they come back in boatloads.
Forcing and Squirming their way inside,
I can't sleep.
Purge and smoke then weep.
I just took four on the stomach.
I've got some blood in this vomit.
I spent time reminiscing and crying,
emotionally dying.
My mind is racing,
I feel like im going crazy.
I promised myself I'd forget you,
and years later I'm sitting here missing you.
How am I supposed to get rid of this attachment to you,
When it feels like you have my heart in a vice grip.
Up til 5 Am, with coffee and cancer sticks.
I knew the day would come but I was wishing you didn't know too.
You were the only drug I needed.
Now that I'm having these withdrawals,
I'll search for you in my sleep tomorrow.