Toxcity is a thing which afflicts any fandom, because there are most people who doesn't distinguish between being a fan and a parasite....
Unfortunately I had some contact with such people and some things you posted above are a minimum part of a creepier reality...
I read on the net a quote used by a fan about a thing not related to visual kei (and to music in general), which says: "Fandom is fandom's evil."
Simply meaning that a fandom is made mainly by toxic people, who uses social media for insulting others, their presumed favourite artists, without caring about the consequences of their actions...
In particular there are a lot of people critcizing each damn band from Starwave Records, not only because of Kiwamu's attitude, but only because they have features common to DEG and old-school bands; the recent drama about Takemasa from Kiryu; all the mad gossip around Gackt; the toxic pandemonium known as TANUKI; the feud between DEG and GazettE's "fans"; the fanservice about musicians who some people think to be engaged; the people (especially in the West) who attend to expensive concerts only for picking up torn clothes (referring to Mana's sad adventure in Milan concert on 2007, when his dress was torn up, https://tensi-chan.livejournal.com/21912.html) and not knowing any single word of the songs (DEG when toured on USA sometime ago), or claiming that people are not GazettE's fans because they don't have Heresy subscription...
There is more to talk about... but this attitude is wrong and stupid and hurts the true supporters of a scene, the musicians and the genre itself, seen as a fetish for fanboys and fangirls and nothing else...