Single People Thread

[RoseOfHizaki 131]

Single for life, because i don't like people!

 

 

I can kind of relate to this, I wouldnt say im the antisocial type. I adore company but i seek to isolate myself because people are generally full of shit or complete assholes and this 'mentality' has effected me a little in life. I find it hard to keep a job because I tend to get into an argument with management for whatever reason then straight up say i cant be dealin with their shit anymore and resign or walk out. Im am HAPPY to work through hardships. Life is a constant up hill struggle and it pays to have some grit and be persistent. but when managers are assholes and fuck with me because they can then I cant just sit there and take it sitting down and i have had my fair share of bad managers. My current manager is a complete knob but unfortunately I have debts to pay off before I can move on so im pretty much stuck in the grind.

 

I love chatting with the people at work though. It makes the time go quicker.

[Nyasagi 259]

sai, maybe I misunderstood you, but that's how I understood your post, sorry. It's also too difficult to change it. I tried to lie to myself I don't dislike my appearance, but in the end all these feelings exploded with a multiple force one day, it was worse than before, so it's better to accept it, instead of trying to get rid of it.

 

miyuu, I think it's a common thing to feel different about men and women. In my case I got more experience with girls and I haven't had a crush on a guy since high school, but crushes on girls happen once in a while (it's easy for me to have a crush on someone as well, but it dies very easily as well, no one is ever interested, so it's not a big deal, I already got experience with throwing such things out of my head). I usually like looking at photos of good looking guys, but in general men freak me out. I'm too ugly for them, I feel like they would be less accepting, because I was bullied mostly by boys and girls know what to expect from a female body. I'd probably feel the safest in a non-sexual relationship, I think.

 

cruel-crucible, I thought I was the only one who doesn't like going out too much (some company is nice, but I'm often tired, so I want to go to sleep or just take my pants off and sit in front of the computer), but has no problems with socialising (just look at me posting all the time here, maybe I should stop lol). *high fives* I also feel the same about people. Just because they have a pretty face, it doesn't mean they're a nice person. Just the pretty face matters when you want to sleep with someone and nothing else, imo.

 

RoseOfHizaki, it's good to know I'm not the only one who can't deal with the job bullshit. I always ended up leaving all my jobs after a few days (the last time was because the woman making a work schedule was a huge cunt and I didn't sign my contract yet, so I didn't come next day and shut my phone off xD), I also can't kiss asses very well, I'm too honest xD. If there was an interesting concert or other thing more important for me than a job, and they didn't give me a free day, I'd probably not come to job anyway, lololol. Don't worry, not all people are made to be slaves. You should open your own company and be your own boss, but then you'd still have to deal with the customers and that's also shitty xD

[Kaye 296]

Can I hug you? I mean, this sounds way too much like myself.

 

Everyone around me seems to find it easy to find people they're interested in very fast. Like, they walk into a bar and within 3 minutes they'll have scanned the whole area and located at least 2 potential partners. Somehow my attraction to others isn't based on looks - sure, I can say "this guy's hot" when I see someone attractive, but it doesn't make me immediately interested in him. I need to get to know the guy, judge his intellect, look for common interests, make sure our personalities won't clash. 

 

Besides, I'm not the most outgoing person out there. I'm very sociable and people generally like me, but I don't enjoy going out very often as I like spending time by myself. I don't actively look for a relationship and maybe for this reason have been told a few times that I'm too "hard to get" and "scare guys away".

 

Let me hug you right back.

 

It seems you and I are very similar on this point. I have also been told that I shouldn't be as "hard to get" and I know for a fact that I scare guys away because I'm too independent and I don't need a guy to be able to live my live well. Like, I don't need them to be able to keep up, and I guess that's still something guys often want from a girl. To have someone they can protect and who really needs them.

 

I never actively go and search for people (basically all you said is "me" in some way). I wouldn't be able to. The last guy I got interested in I met at random. We were both totally shocked at how well we matched and how we'd even met in such a way. It's basically an episode out of a drama series, but well, with a similar drama ending. But it was honestly the first time in about 7 years (which is when I met my ex for the first time) that I'd actually really felt like that. That guy's mind was way more interesting than anything else and to be fair, that's all that's going to keep me interested in someone anyway. Layers and layers of personality to go through, with more things to be discovered every day. I find it very weird to be able to fall head over heels for a guy I've only met 5 minutes ago. What is it that you fall in love with then anyway? Can't be much else but his looks, or some kind of aura?

[miyuu 40]

L

 

I find it very weird to be able to fall head over heels for a guy I've only met 5 minutes ago. What is it that you fall in love with then anyway? Can't be much else but his looks, or some kind of aura?

 

i think maybe the difference is that you can't feel sexual attraction.as you said?

have you ever saw anyone or even famous that you would just want to sleep with?

i mean having a crush is probably hormones maybe,i don't know. finding someone sexually attractive can lead to having a crush.

so you can't stop thinking about him and suddenly you care about everything he likes and want to learn about it etc

if i start finding him interesting intellectual or feel emotional connection or care honestly abour same things . that's love. that's where you're starting to love him.

not being in love or having a crush.

 

@Nyasagi yes maybe it's phychological to me too at some part ,sometimes i think .but i don't know why exactly

[Xixi 3]

I've not been on a date or ever had a boyfriend, but i'm happy to be single c: though it can get lonely at times, i think i just need more friends.

[RoseOfHizaki 131]

RoseOfHizaki, it's good to know I'm not the only one who can't deal with the job bullshit. I always ended up leaving all my jobs after a few days (the last time was because the woman making a work schedule was a huge cunt and I didn't sign my contract yet, so I didn't come next day and shut my phone off xD), I also can't kiss asses very well, I'm too honest xD. If there was an interesting concert or other thing more important for me than a job, and they didn't give me a free day, I'd probably not come to job anyway, lololol. Don't worry, not all people are made to be slaves. You should open your own company and be your own boss, but then you'd still have to deal with the customers and that's also shitty xD

 

well I dunno what it is that you do but mines more of an agency type of work so theres no paperwork or anything that states that I have to stick to working monday to friday - they call me up to offer me work. I pick the days i want to work and the rest get handed to someone else. There are positions available where i can work monday to friday but I dont want to be chained to the job - Unfortunately I get paid a little less because of this but flexibility is really important to me and its because I refuse to move to a mon-friday slot that annoys my manager and he messes about with my the work im given. either cancelling my shifts at real short notice. making me work every weekend unless I say i cant do it or sending me way out of zone to work - were talking about at least 1hr20mins commute.

 

some weeks i dont get work and i can definitely say that it has something to do with my manager. He doesnt know Im out of the country for a month. I told him i was going but not when because last time I tried to talk to him he wouldnt listen to me.

 

Ive written a letter of complaint to HQ about it - nobody can force me to work places where i dont want to work and I refuse to work for a manager that wont listen to or return my calls.

 

If he wants to be an asshole he can do what he wants. Ive done him favors in the past and dropped everything i was doing so i could go into work at short notice because they were short staffed but I wont do that if he wants to fuck me about - my time is my time.

[Kaye 296]

i think maybe the difference is that you can't feel sexual attraction.as you said?

have you ever saw anyone or even famous that you would just want to sleep with?

i mean having a crush is probably hormones maybe,i don't know. finding someone sexually attractive can lead to having a crush.

so you can't stop thinking about him and suddenly you care about everything he likes and want to learn about it etc

if i start finding him interesting intellectual or feel emotional connection or care honestly abour same things . that's love. that's where you're starting to love him.

not being in love or having a crush.

 

@Nyasagi yes maybe it's phychological to me too at some part ,sometimes i think .but i don't know why exactly

 

I can feel sexual attraction, but it's not my first thing to get noticed. I have my set of artists I'd love to get to know better but I find none of them sexually attractive. I don't know them. Because I don't know them, I wouldn't want to sleep with them. Somehow that's just how my mind/brains work. I'd rather figure out how their mind works than dive into bed with them.

 

Having a crush is definitely hormones, but for me the falling in love moves further when I start getting to know someone better. The crush is more like what happens after I've picked up an interest in a guy. Let's say, after I've met him once or twice.

 

Not everyone gets the same things in the same order.

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

I'm nearly 20 and never even went on a date '_' I fell in love once and I was thinking that it was going to be my very first relationship with a girl, but in the end it has been all screwed up.

Anyway, I don't really mind if I'm single for the rest of my life. Actually I prefer to stay on my own without stressing about "relationship stuff"...I'm already stressed with studying, so please let's not increase it. However sometimes it seems like I need to be in a relationship because almost all my closest friends are coupled and they seem so happy... :')

And I also hate people who tell me "Isn't it time you had a gf?" and stuff like that...just f**k you. Everything comes when it's its moment, there's no rush!

[RoseOfHizaki 131]

I'm nearly 20 and never even went on a date '_' I fell in love once and I was thinking that it was going to be my very first relationship with a girl, but in the end it has been all screwed up.

Anyway, I don't really mind if I'm single for the rest of my life. Actually I prefer to stay on my own without stressing about "relationship stuff"...I'm already stressed with studying, so please let's not increase it. However sometimes it seems like I need to be in a relationship because almost all my closest friends are coupled and they seem so happy... :')

And I also hate people who tell me "Isn't it time you had a gf?" and stuff like that...just f**k you. Everything comes when it's its moment, there's no rush!

 

 

Well, depending how emotionally involved you were in your relationships, being alone can bite pretty hard. I broke up with my last gf what must of been almost a decade ago if not longer but that doesnt mean my heart misses her any less. I miss being close, the hugs and snuggles we shared, the hours spent in each others arms... Of course its all emotional bullshit at the end of the day and you're probably thinking "I dont need that..." but its like an addiction your heart and soul craves.

 

The pain is very real. You can spend your entire youth trying to reach out and hold on to something that seems to be getting further and further away no matter how fast youre running, and the moment you realise that you will never catch up to what it is youre chasing it will strike you down and it will keep doing it like a phantom pain even though you've mustered up all of your strength and courage to carry on running even though theres no end in sight.

 

I guess people like me with the same way of thinking are doomed like this.

 

That doesnt stop friends and friends of friends saying that they have no idea why i dont have a gf. Some things are just not meant to be.

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

Well, depending how emotionally involved you were in your relationships, being alone can bite pretty hard. I broke up with my last gf what must of been almost a decade ago if not longer but that doesnt mean my heart misses her any less. I miss being close, the hugs and snuggles we shared, the hours spent in each others arms... Of course its all emotional bullshit at the end of the day and you're probably thinking "I dont need that..." but its like an addiction your heart and soul craves.

The pain is very real. You can spend your entire youth trying to reach out and hold on to something that seems to be getting further and further away no matter how fast youre running, and the moment you realise that you will never catch up to what it is youre chasing it will strike you down and it will keep doing it like a phantom pain even though you've mustered up all of your strength and courage to carry on running even though theres no end in sight.

I guess people like me with the same way of thinking are doomed like this.

That doesnt stop friends and friends of friends saying that they have no idea why i dont have a gf. Some things are just not meant to be.

Well, it was my first time falling in love, so I was all happy with the idea of being in love with someone and what not, but when she told me that I wasn't the right guy for her, my heart literally broke, because I was so in love with her. And I cried, when I was alone, for at least a week over this, but she never left my thoughts...she was still my first thought when I woke up for a couple months later and only, like, 2 months ago I started to focus on other things and slowly "erasing" my unconditional love for her.

But lately I've been thinking that I should talk to her again, because I feel empty and I need her in my life anyway.

By the way, I really think that I'm doomed to never get a gf in my life...

[nullmoon 784]

I implore all of you to never lose hope! I used to think the same way and thought I would grow old all on my own...and then I met my girlfriend. We've been together for over 5 years now and she's just perfect...I have no idea what I did to deserve her but I just want you guys and girls to know that true love is actually possible! (as corny as that sounds )

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

I implore all of you to never lose hope! I used to think the same way and thought I would grow old all on my own...and then I met my girlfriend. We've been together for over 5 years now and she's just perfect...I have no idea what I did to deserve her but I just want you guys and girls to know that true love is actually possible! (as corny as that sounds )

I'm really happy for you

[RoseOfHizaki 131]

Its ok to grow old alone. Its when youre all bitter about it and take it out on other people who have relationships thats not acceptable.

 

I wouldnt say ive given up all hope but at the same time Im not keeping my hopes up. I can spend less time crying about how sad and depressing my life is.

 

As always - the first step to take before you can move forward is admitting there's a problem and dealing with it in the appropriate  manner.

 

 

 

Yours sincerely.

 

Advocate of the Forever Alone Committee 

[nullmoon 784]

I'm really happy for you

Thanks

[Guest MollyMouse]

Single Pringle ready to flamingle lol but no really , being single is pretty cool if you think about it! Sure it's nice to feel "loved" it have someone to call "your own" , but there's always platonic love! Plus when you're single , you can flirt and check out as much as you want with out being considered a fluffing douchebag dickwad for cheating!!....as long as you know to stop when who ever you're flirting with is not comfortable!

Annnnd if you really don't like people or get annoyed easily , you don't have any obligation to talk to someone! ^w^

[Licio123 181]

Almost 4 years without a girfriend here. I don't go out very often, I work at home, more and more I think that's the problem. I hate going to parties and all those things...

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

Almost 4 years without a girfriend here. I don't go out very often, I work at home, more and more I think that's the problem. I hate going to parties and all those things...

^Maybe that's my problem too. I don't really go out much either...I prefer staying at home and just relax or go to a friend's house and watch a film, talking, having fun with each other than going for example to the disco or something, where there are 426443652647 billions of people that you don't even know.

[Licio123 181]

^Maybe that's my problem too. I don't really go out much either...I prefer staying at home and just relax or go to a friend's house and watch a film, talking, having fun with each other than going for example to the disco or something, where there are 426443652647 billions of people that you don't even know.

 

Exactly. I hate those crowded places...

[Gaz 1097]

But lately I've been thinking that I should talk to her again, because I feel empty and I need her in my life anyway.

 

so did you start to talk with her again?

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

so did you start to talk with her again?

Not yet...

[Peace Heavy mk II 7200]

Not yet...

Don't.

 

You're setting yourself up for failure. That thrilling feeling of 'is she going to want me this time?????' is addicting, but it always ends up burning after. Eventually, the feeling of defeat becomes addicting as well and it just spirals into nothing healthy.

[keyinjpop 89]

I'm single, not interested in relationships right now since I'm a mess.

[CAT5 9075]

I'm not single anymore, i'm married to the universe

[Scarlet Obsidian 383]

Don't.

You're setting yourself up for failure. That thrilling feeling of 'is she going to want me this time?????' is addicting, but it always ends up burning after. Eventually, the feeling of defeat becomes addicting as well and it just spirals into nothing healthy.

I know, it's just that I want to talk to her and want to know if she's still open for a friendship, but I don't have the guts to text her or something... I'm afraid of the answer she'd give me...

[Seimeisen 4406]

I've been single my entire life. Never dated a guy. Because I'm 21, it feels weird as fuck!

I have a friend who I think I have a budding crush on (who lives quite far away from me, but we've met in person), but I feel like it's too soon to say anything to him about it. I don't really know how he feels. I had this idea of dropping a very obvious hint at him (asking some hypothetical question like: "if there was a scenario in the future where I was interested in dating you, would you be interested, too?"), just to gauge if I would ever have a shot with him since I honestly don't know if I do, but I now think the idea of asking that seems kind of dumb. I don't even know if the idea of him and I dating has ever crossed his mind. Never mind, I'm just going to learn to get over it.